Road to Jannah

- If u talk to someone of the opposite sex at 4 am your life will inevitably follow along the lines of an Indian movie.

- Bebzi starts w/ a B because it’s bad for u.

- Pack only as much as u can carry.

- If u do something wrong Islamically u end up paying for it later.

- Rice cakes with chocolate chips actually taste good.

- Never be nice to freaks.

- Don’t think u’ll change ur friends/future spouse; they change u.

- Arabs don’t speak Arabic so don’t bother.

- Only organize a wedding if there’s a diamond ring in it for u.

- PBS actually has some messed up addictive television.

- The aunties in the community r not Allah, so don’t live ur life based upon what they think.

- When u hear a scary noise (esp if ur in a scary movie) don’t go look, send a guy!