Mostly I’m ok with people posting pictures of my kid (because he’s pretty cute!), but I had a very cute picture to post of him that I took in the hospital. I wanted it to be the first one everyone saw, but when I got home from the hospital, I noticed that someone who had come to visit him had already posted a picture of him! The picture they posted was equally as cute, but I still wanted to have the chance to post about him first.

Regarding the 3 months mahr thing, the concept is completely new to me, and now I feel like my husband shafted me (haha!). I do believe that the American tradition is that the engagement ring is about 2 months salary, and I did mention this to my husband when we were looking at rings (before marriage, I was a pretty straightforward bride, I’m lucky I didn’t scare him off!).

Oh and another thing:
-If you’re sick, please don’t visit newborns or other sick people. They have very weak immune systems, and even though you may just have the “sniffles’, or a ‘dry cough’ these can be devastating to a baby or a person already sick.
-If you are not sick, and are visiting a newborn or a sick person please be sure you wash your hands before you pick up the baby, or touch the sick friend. Even if you’re not sick you may have germs on your hands that can kill! Also, wash your hands after you’re done with these things too!!

spectacular post Jannah! well-written mashallah. Maybe you really should consider compiling a written + published guide of sorts for American Muslims that incorporates the best of Western etiquette along with timeless, universal Muslim manners. It would be a fantastic idea. The average Muslim man in North America definitely needs to step up his class a few notches.

Also, in response to what Adilah said – if you look around, the 3-month rule is also found in Western culture; its often suggested, as a rule-of-thumb, that the wedding ring be equal to about one quarter [three months] the man’s annual salary. There is some debate as to who made up that rule, some people say the diamond companies [De Beers, etc] made it up for their own benefit.

Adilah Hmm 3-months mahr is a suggestion I made up not a tradition of anyone’s. In the US and abroad in Arab countries I’ve seen the tradition of Nikah’s at the bride’s home and Walimah’s at the groom’s so it’s definitely not an Indian sub-continent thing. As I said, however ppl want to do things is up to them. This is just a traditional etiquette I’ve seen across a broad spectrum of Muslims from all different backgrounds. The bringing gifts thing to a Rishta seems to be iffy. Some Desis commented and said they don’t bring anything because they feel it might add some pressure on the Rishta but other’s said it’s incredibly rude for a prospective to show up with nothing.

As for “Muslim Etiquette” please read the disclaimer at top in red.