Jul 31, 2009 - marriage stuff    17 Comments

Top 10 Reasons Why Being a Single Muslim Sux :)

Top 10 reasons why being a single Muslim sucks:


Muslim matrimonials

10. People trying to set you up with the weirdo who doesn’t speak English or the guy with 5  1/2 kids looking for a second wife. (And then they call you picky!)

9. Can’t get the family rate at ICNA. (or ISNA or MAS or the subway)

8. You’re never invited to those married couple parties. (Did you know they have their own secret social world, single muggles not allowed.)

7. Attending those ‘singles lectures on marriage’ where they talk about the same ole stuff except real ways of getting us married! (Or they lecture us on why we should just accept our parents choice.)

6. Realizing your kids by the time (if) u have any will be too young to match-make with your  friend’s kids.

5. Pervert guys who think you’re now desperate enough to consider them. (a la Mr. Collins)

4. Meeting long lost old friends who immediately ask, ‘Are you married!? How many kids do you have!?’. (No and no.)

3. Your mom reminds you that at your age she was already married with 3 kids! (Yes, I wish I was a child bride too.)

2. Muslim matrimonials. (Need we say more?)

and……………..

number….

1. Every auntie at every wedding, engagement or aqeeqah saying, ‘You’re next!!’. (Do single people look pregnant or something? :P)

17 Comments

  • LOL.. That’s hilarious. Today I am going to say alhamduliallah that I am married already. But I am pretty sure as smart as u are there has too be atleast ONE brother that is reading ur blog and not a weirdo nor all other things u mentioned. Sorry but LOL that it’s that hard to find good Muslim guys.

  • It is hard!!! Married people can laugh all they want but y’all would cry if you saw my complete FreakFiles!

  • LOL. I belive u. Ur not the only one with those story. My cousin is getting married inshallah and she says the same thing. Guy are shameless, but in all the wrong reasons. So any prospect or should the rest of us keep praying Sis..

  • and .All of your got freaky cousins are getting married and your mom goes..how about giving him some sympathy proposals so he doesn’t feel bad -_-
    urgghhh and the wedding are awful..
    ‘kitna pyara hai mashAllah..lol’
    great article sister! and so was the ‘how to not be a jerk!’

  • Hahaha..I absolutely agree.I love your writing as usual..

  • I love the cartoon you put up…it’s hilarious:)

  • lol nomes, i think for me i’d get matched with a choc chip brownie… deep, sensitive on the inside, slightly chipped but on the whole a great experience ;)

  • Hahahaha, I remember the freakyfiles. Can Farihah & I browse through them again one day? Pleassee.. *pouts*?

  • oh come on it cant suck so bad … otherwise all the married guys wouldn’t be so jealous of me

  • Anam i don’t want to put u gals off marriage :p maverick indeed… a bro wrote a response i’ll be posting it next week iA :)

  • I feel your pain sis! May Allah Swt bless us with a good and virtuous partner, who has a crazy sense of humour! Ameen.

  • LOL NT ALL GUYS ARE BAD. IT IS JUST THAT the good 1ns r hard to find :) inshallah u will find a great spouse

  • Word!!! Jannah (if this is really your name– pretty awesome blog title!) we need to hang :-)…

  • maybe by the time you fiinds someone it will be too late… too old to live life and see ur kids

  • lol, very funny, we do have so many things to make us laugh bout bein single, its not so bad afterall, thnx i needed that

  • Being a single is given. Nothing wrong is being a single. Just do for faith to ALLAH. If HE gives us “someone”, it means our turn to live in marriage. If not, just do our best.

  • With regards to #1, I will bring up a joke.

    There was a person whom every aunty would approach during marriage functions and say “your next!”, and it would just frustrate that person so much that he decided to get revenge. How’d he do it?

    Well whenever there was a janazah in the khandaan(family), he would go up to these SAME old aunties and say “your next!”.

    haha, im sure you guys know this one but for those who don’t, enjoy and share!