so it’s 5 am and i’m wide awake and in pain. my tooth is killing me… it’s been aching like this on and off for weeks. i know, i know, why don’t i go to the dentist right!! easy for you to say but i don’t have dental insurance! what if i need a root canal and it costs $1400…ugh.. why oh why didn’t i go to the dentist before when i did have insurance… well i did like once or twice but they were such evil, mean people i didn’t go again.
and maybe i should have started drinking diet a long time ago. and like brushing after every meal, chewing that dental gum stuff, and flossing twice a day and using the extra-powerful-itsaysitsorange-butitsreallyhorrible-listerine stuff.
yes dawn is a good time to bring out all the regrets. while we’re at it i can regret a lot of other things in my life. like not going away for college, not waiting a few years to do my masters, not staying in syria longer the first time, not trying harder to get married way back years earlier… well gee this could go on forever… and while it’s somewhat distracting me from the pain it’s not helping.
i think at this point i start praying. excuse me a min.
ok back, yeah what is it with us humans we only pray when we are in pain and need something . whatever happened to praying to be thankful for something. when is the last time i actually did that? probably at hajj.
never grateful, never grateful, isn’t that what our problem is. we never stop at what we have and are content with it. we always want more, the big screen tv, the bmw, the iphone. (well perhaps the iphone would make us happy for a lil while at least) but it wouldn’t last for long… we’d want something else. so we keep asking Allah for more and more and more and do we thank Him for what we already have.
yeah these are all rhetorical questions that i don’t really want to answer either.
allright i’ll let you guys RUMInate on all that. (get it… reference to previous poetry post..ha..ha) while i go pray fajr and pray for a miracle.