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 on: Feb. 15, 2012, 06:22 PM 
Started by jannah - Last post by A_Khn

This article doesnt paint a happy picture. It is overly focussed on the negatives, therefore lacking in portraying a balanced view. What its doing is describing a few immoral ways observed by Some lower middle class south asian families desperately looking to move to UK. Reminds me of hindi tv series my maid back in Kashmir used to watch.

 on: Feb. 15, 2012, 07:34 AM 
Started by halfmydeen - Last post by halfmydeen

 on: Feb. 15, 2012, 07:28 AM 
Started by halfmydeen - Last post by halfmydeen

Mars and Venus: Marriage, Love & Mercy - Riad Ouarzazi

 on: Feb. 15, 2012, 05:51 AM 
Started by BrotherIslam87 - Last post by jannah

tried that and it didn't work :(

i'll look for it around youtube!!


 on: Feb. 14, 2012, 11:11 PM 
Started by BrotherIslam87 - Last post by BrotherIslam87

The link above redirects you to well known muslim charity Ummah Welfare's wedding funding page. For £200 GBP you can fund an entire wedding for less fortunate muslims. £200 is nothing compared to money spend on wedding by some of us.

Remember your less fortunate bro & sis and inshallah Allah will remember you in your search for a spouse. Let us make an intention to sponsor one wedding, inshallah when we wed someday.

 on: Feb. 14, 2012, 10:47 PM 
Started by BrotherIslam87 - Last post by BrotherIslam87
The hindu version resembles the a non-practising muslim search. But I can't believe the girl who eventually got married desired or preferred a guy from the same village as her mum... I thought when she is born & bred in Britian she will won't have much affinity to a tiny village but I was proved wrong...

 on: Feb. 14, 2012, 10:37 PM 
Started by BrotherIslam87 - Last post by BrotherIslam87

This is a documentary on British Muslims seeking a partner.Here the Birmingham Central Mosque helps them find partners through it's Matrimonial Service Section. Very Interesting and the documentary name is "Revelations: Muslim and Looking for Love" aired in Channel 4 . The link posted may not work, if doesn't then just right click on the screen and click on "popout"  then you will be able to see it as a popout video....don't ask the logic(it is a trick which works)

 on: Feb. 13, 2012, 09:16 AM 
Started by BrotherIslam87 - Last post by jannah
Ok, didn't like it. Those poor women. Why don't the mens just go to their house and propose like normal human beings. The whole stealing/maybe raping is just frightening. Of course the family is pressured into saying yes. The girl has no choice at all.

About the whole chechnya politics... theres definitely two sides to every story. Though not discounting what she said that ppl live under fear. That's how it is/was in most muslim countries unfortunately :(

 on: Feb. 13, 2012, 03:44 AM 
Started by jannah - Last post by jannah
Four Tips for Finding Your Other Half

By Nafisa Sekandari & Hosai Mojaddidi

Do you both have the same ideals, values, dreams, and aspirations?

For Muslims, there is no better example or precedent of an ideal husband than the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).

He was the most loving, kind, humble, merciful, compassionate, loyal, trust-worthy, and generous husband to ever have existed; indeed his example in every facet of life is perfect and the list of his attributes are far too many to enumerate.

For this reason, he is the standard every Muslim woman should use when looking for a spouse.

For Muslim men, the standards of what to look for in an ideal wife are found in the prophetic tradition:

“A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser.” (Al Bukhari)

In addition to learning from the perfect example and advice of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), when considering prospective suitors it’s helpful to outline specific qualities and issues to think about. We’ve provided four important tips for you to keep in mind below:


When you first meet someone, you may have instant physical attraction, but this should not be confused with love. Love is something you must work on. It has to be created and developed between the two of you. Kindness and giving create love. A love that is giving and kind is based on an internal connection and is more lasting. Physical attraction is an external connection and will fade over time.
How do you know if they are caring, kind, and compassionate?

Love that is based on giving is because you care about the person, not because you want to get something back in return. This giving must go both ways. Both individuals must give to each other from a place of compassion and caring. So look for someone that is able to give to you and motivates you to give back to them. Marry a person you want to give to even if you get nothing back in return.

How do you know if they are caring, kind, and compassionate? Listen to them. Listen to what they say, watch how they treat others, and listen to how they feel about helping those in need. Pay attention to how they treat you when you need sympathy. Are they so self-absorbed they fail to recognize your needs or do they take in your problem and try to give you empathy?

If you really pay attention, you can pick up a lot about a person’s character by how they speak to others and how they speak about others. Do they look down on other people, are they only focused on themselves and their needs; is their reaction towards other people extreme?

Beware of any type of love that lacks a sense of giving and a sense of caring.

Common Goals

It’s very important to know yourself first and then consider whether you share common goals with your partner. Do you both have the same ideals, values, dreams, and aspirations? In essence, you should both be going in the same direction. If your partner has dreams and aspirations that go in the opposite direction from you, you cannot share a life together, even if that person is kind and giving.

You might say, “What if they don’t have any goals and are willing to go in any direction I’m going”? Be careful of this type of thinking; being with a person who lacks self-awareness and direction in his/her life will only complicate your life. He/she needs to mature and develop a sense of self before he/she can make important life-long decisions.

Many couples find themselves on the road to divorce because after the initial honeymoon phase is over, partners begin to realize their goals in life differ from those of their spouse. It’s important to be on the same page initially. Early on in the relationship, make it a point to discuss issues like how many kids you want to have, how you will raise them, what values you want to instill in them, and what type of lifestyle you want to have, etc. You must know what the other person’s goals are and really objectively consider if those goals are compatible with yours.

Consider the Whole Person

Many people get into marriages with the unrealistic expectation or idealized sense of what a spouse is supposed to be

Learn to appreciate the whole person which includes the good, the bad, and the ugly. Realize that the person you care about has all the great qualities you enjoy as well as some you may not enjoy. Many people get into marriages with the unrealistic expectation or idealized sense of what a spouse is supposed to be. One spouse may focus so much on the hope that the other part will possess all the wonderful qualities of a spouse without considering the possibility of any negative ones. It is this idealized expectation which oftentimes leads couples down the path of divorce.

Going into a marriage with the realization that people are imperfect will help you see that with all the advantages that come with a wonderful partner, there will also be some disadvantages as well. Knowing and preparing for this in advance might lessen the shock and help you both work together at building the relationship you want. You will never have it all in a relationship.

Ask yourself, what is more important to you? Is it more important to have someone you can have a deep and meaningful connection with or someone that will keep a nice and tidy house? You may not get both. Is it more important to you to have a responsible and reliable partner or someone that is fun and adventurous? What areas are you willing to compromise in?

Physical Appearance

Last but not least should be looks and physical attraction. Physical attraction isn’t necessarily based on a standard of physical beauty. What you find beautiful may not be what your friends find beautiful but it’s important that you like how they look. They don’t have to be physically perfect but they should definitely appeal to you. And keep in mind that looks alone cannot make the relationship. What matters more is how compatible you are, how giving you each are in the relationship, and how much you care about each other. The fact that you both find each other attractive is definitely important but try to see it as the icing on the cake instead of the main ingredient.

In order for any relationship to succeed you have to have the humility to recognize the limitations in yourself and in others. We are all from God and everyone has flaws and shortcomings. No one is perfect. For this reason, you must be willing to throw out the term “perfect” and compromise for the “good enough” relationship and the “good enough” partner.

It’s unrealistic and arrogant to think you deserve perfection. Since you are not perfect you should learn to accept the imperfections of others. The one who thinks the world of himself is usually the one who expects the world from others.

 on: Feb. 13, 2012, 03:37 AM 
Started by BrotherIslam87 - Last post by BrotherIslam87
Was tired of searching for brides decently through matrimonial sites & family connection....started looking for an alternative           :-)...Maybe for me the time has come to stop searching and get in touch with Mulla Alvi....... and @jannah Who knows he may even deal with kidnapped grooms too!!! :-D

On a serious note it just pathetic.. but to be honest I can't believe the girls are fine with it...and it ends in happy marriage for at least two of three cases reported......

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