Going back to the original question, we know that the system is obviously not working, and this signals either a flaw in the system or in the way it is applied. I tend to believe the flaw is in the system and the way it was constructed over centuries. Jannah seems to wish there was an "auntie network" here just like back in Muslim countries, but I think that the auntie-network is precisely the problem. Muslims are expected to meet their future spouses through their parents or aunties, and any other avenue for people to meet will be fought and condemned by the guardians of the Muslim culture, be it parents, relatives, or religious figures.
I don't know when did our system of marriage start, but I can't find any referral to this system during the days of the prophet (pbuh). During those days, it wasn't a taboo for men and women to talk, even the knowledgeable scholars would say that it's not prohibited for men and women to talk, as long as each respects their boundaries. They did say however that it is prohibited for men and women to make joyful conversations (al-tabassot fi al-kalam). I think that this is how marriages started during the days of the prophet (pbuh), people knew each other because it wasn’t taboo for people of opposite genders to talk, and they were able therefore to make their own choices. I never heard about a companion's mother taking her son to meet potential "candidates". Men and women knew each other, and there was no need for any more introductions or intrusions from the parents.
Since childhood, Mulsim boys and girls are taught that talking to the other gender is haram, and that the only way they can know each other is through the family. I see that as another control mechanism that our control-hungry societies have developed to make sure that everything is run under the absolute power of the parents. I personally think that this was imported into our culture from the orthodox Jewish culture (that's just my personal opinion, no scientific research to back it up).
Going back to where I started, I think that the auntie network is the problem because it teaches us from the beginning that genders should be completely separated and that we should be totally dependant on “the network”, by the time we grow up and realize we are being fixed up with people we don't even know, it's already too late to seek any other avenue, and people either submit to the system getting married to someone they barely know, and living ever after, but not happily, or they rebel against the system falling in the temptations and mixing love with happy life and finally waking up when it is too late.
Waw, did I really write all of this?! Careful Carrie Bradshaw, you've got some competition..lol. if you made it to this line it means that you have super patience, you love reading, or probably have nothing better to do in life (maybe single?...hehe). I have to say though that I would be the first to say that my analysis may be totally up side down, but at least this is the way I see it. So please correct me if you think I am wrong.