Thanks for posting. Since this site is brand new it might take awhile for people to get into the discussion, so just be patient
I think the most important thing I've learned over the years are that there are two types of guys: 1. is ready to get married to you and 2. is not. The VAST MAJORITY are #2 (especially the ones u like most of the time unfortunately). The trick is to figure out which is which and not get your heart broken.
I've seen it happen over and over again with girls my age (almost every single girl in my friends circle) and all the way down to younger 16-17 year olds. Allah put this need in us to be close to the opposite sex. So, somehow or other we get involved with someone, or start talking to someone, or 'liking someone'. We casually talk to them or even worse develop a 'semi-relationship' with the expectation that it will lead to marriage one day. A lot of times brothers however think it's just a friendship, or worse yet he continues the relationship because of that need for 'female companionship' consciously or unconsciously. Some even continue it with the thought 'oh well i can always marry her if no one else comes along'. Some continue it thinking they will convince their own families to accept you later on.
But let's be honest with ourselves. If he 'can't get married right now' what makes us think he will be willing to marry us 2-3 years down the line. What makes us think he is independent from his parents and that they will accept us with open arms? What makes us think that he won't change his mind, meet someone else, or a million other things.
Learn from my generation's mistakes sisters!
Don't get into that type of relationship. Please. Just don't. Find someone who is ready and willing to marry you and has their family's blessing right now. Don't wait around for 'brother maybe' (no matter how much u like and admire him).
I can give you story after story....
A sister met this guy in high school... went through all of college together with intentions to marry... in the end he marries his cousin.
A sister met this guy and he proposed and said his family would come around. 2 years later they still threaten to disown him and he decides to drop the proposal.
A sister talked to this guy for a year and in the end he says he 'can't get married right now', yet is busy looking for someone else to marry.
A sister is interested in this brother for years. She is everything he wants but in the end says sorry I want someone younger because you're too old and I don't want to have kids right now.
A sister talks to a brother for marriage. He is always wishy-washy for months. Turns out later he was already interested in someone else, but continued for the sake of his friends/family.
Anyway sometimes the guy who is interested in you more is better than the guy who you are interested in. So think about it!!