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Author Topic: What do you do when you're sad?  (Read 2989 times)

jannah

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What do you do when you're sad?
« on: Mar. 29, 2009, 07:43 AM »

salam,

Sometimes I feel sad when someone I know gets engaged/married. Happy for them of course, but sad that I'm still our there unmarried and may be forever. What do you guys do to cheer yourselves up when frustrated/tired/sad about this whole marriage thing??

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reeldeel

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #1 on: Mar. 29, 2009, 11:53 AM »

Sadness, it was once the story of my life, I used to sit and think... a brother cant get a girlfriend and a brother cant get married, Life is perfect the way it is except for this single flaw. So I've studied sadness with respect to myself and found all the things that alleviate it, this included researching through various self help books on mood, emotions, depression etc.

1. By far the best remedy is Tahajjud, once you get it going you'll soon realize the sadness is gone or at least significantly reduced.

2. Constant recitation of the Quran, especially surah baqra. No matter how sad you're feeling, if you start reading sura baqra, you'll feel better befor you reach the end.

3. Zikr, (la illa ha illaallah) as much as you can. The other one I used to do which worked excellent untill I was told it may be Bid'a or sufism is repeating the 99 names of allah by saying [Ya (name)] especially Rasheed and Saboor, between magrib and isha prayer.

4. do streneous exercise to get a "runners high"
http://www.healthcentral.com/fitorfat/408/41285.html

5. What ever you do keep busy, (TV is not busy).

This list has worked for me time and time agian, amazing thing is sometimes when am real down, I actually forget the list, I think i'll put it on the wall or someting. hope it helps
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jannah

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #2 on: Mar. 30, 2009, 06:55 AM »

ws,

thanks... i should try some of those things... maybe i'll try some strenuous gardening now that the weather is nice!!
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Jeremy

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #3 on: Apr. 01, 2009, 03:47 AM »

I should add two points to what reeldeel said. First, sadness is part of who we are as human beings, and we should embrace it as another emotion. There will always be ups and downs, and just like we accept feeling happy sometimes we should accept feeling down. It's not normal for someone to be happy all the time.
Second, try to fill your time with useful activities, anything that would take away the extra free time. When you are doing nothing or watching TV, your brain will wonder and start thinking about what if and what could have been done, and free time is a spoiler of the human being as the Prophet SAW said. So get yourself busy with something, exercise, volunteer, read useful books and Quran, find a hobby, and activity would do as long as you immerse yourself in it. You'll notice at some point that you won't even have the time to think about your sadness anymore.
Here's one indicator.. if you have time to write on this forum and read all these entries, maybe you need to fill your time with something....hehehe
And yet you are still reading... and I am still writing  ;D
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jannah

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #4 on: Apr. 02, 2009, 06:08 AM »

wsalam,

true i mostly feel depressed when i'm not doing anything... or too lazy to do anything but just sit there and think about stuff... sigh i think i need to get like a 70 hour job or something!!

ws
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Eemo

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #5 on: Apr. 02, 2009, 02:40 PM »

My best aid for combatting the sadness has been my focus on personal development.

Whether thats through reading, or watching video or meeting people that are involved in it.

It has helped me create a much stronger sense of self, and has been more rewarding (aside from the money factor) than getting a job that keeps me busy for the sake of being busy.

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justKhan22

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #6 on: May. 19, 2009, 05:20 PM »

Yeah I get wht u mean i dnt get upset but i get feeling where i feeling a lil down looool

but jsut dnna i guess we have sentiment attached with marriege. I jsut have to pick myself up cheer myself up. SImple and nt disciss marriage haha, the answer of course is simpy marriage.
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Muslimah21

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #7 on: May. 19, 2009, 06:55 PM »

Always Chocolate, my fav is Aero mint :D
 
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Hamza81

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #8 on: Jun. 02, 2009, 06:59 PM »

salam,

I always feel sad when someone I know gets engaged/married. Happy for them of course, but sad that I'm still our there unmarried and may be forever. What do you guys do to cheer yourselves up when frustrated/tired/sad about this whole marriage thing??

Yes I know exactly what you mean. It is shaythan who tries to put us down and tries to make us think that we will never find the one and that we will be alone forever whilst everyone else is happy.
If we have tawakkul and full hope and reliance on Allah with respect to EVERY aspect of our lives then how can sadness and depression ever overcome us?

How can sadness overcome us when Allah has chosen us out of Billions and given us the most special gift of imaan that which he does not give to everyone but he chose us and gave this gift to us. We will NEVER realise how luck we truly are!

How can sadness ever overcome us when Allah is there for us and is sustaining us when there are MILLIONS of people that are so unfortunate in this world and we could have easily be in their position but look at what Allah has given us! He has not only created us Muslims but given us luxurious lifestyles compared to what most people have in this world.

We should always look at those who have less and that will make us realise what we have got and how much Allah has blessed us. Even though these people may have so little they are still content and happy. Contentment and happiness ONLY comes from Allah and we can ONLY gain it from being obedient to the commandments of Allah and remembering and glorifying him as much as we can.

Let us not be ungrateful but let us be appreciative for Allah gives more to those who are thankful to him and grateful to him of what he’s given us.

Let us also have full trust, hope and reliance on him because he will give us what is best for us not what we think is best for us.

Let us build our hereafter because we are only on this earth for a few seconds in comparison to the hereafter so every second we waste being sad and depressed for no reason we are wasting when we could build our place in Jannah where we will inshallah reside in FOREVER.

We have to have our ultimate purpose and goal always in mind and always busy ourselves in trying our best in achieving this goal.Our aim is to gain Jannah and to do that we need to fulfil the commandments of Allah to the best of our ability and we have to remember that Jannah will be forever and that will be our eternal home inshallah so this in mind how can we ever be sad? This world is only very short so do we really have time to be sad or depressed? NO!

So with this in mind let us not be sad and depressed but be happy for what Allah has given us and be happy because we have FULL hope, trust and reliance in him for he is the one that will give us what is best for us so let us make him the happiest so that he may make us the happiest and give us contentment because contentment is ONLY with him not in anything else!
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Muslimah21

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #9 on: Jun. 03, 2009, 03:56 PM »

Mashallah very good advice brother. That has helped me out alot :D

jazakallah khier
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reeldeel

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #10 on: Jul. 09, 2009, 10:32 PM »

I recently went and spent a 3 month holiday with my family after being away for 3 years. My father had travelled and I was man of the house. Considering the amount of responsibilities I had especially after being responsible for only my self which switched to taking care of 2 little siblings and general errands for everyone in the house, there came a point in that 3 month period when I can say Allhamdulillah am not married yet.
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Muslimah21

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #11 on: Jul. 14, 2009, 12:26 AM »

Are you being serious?

ok, well i have gotten tp a point where i cant stand it. Iv never been one to be alone.. im quiet social and i like to be around allot of people, a moroccan thing. and i like big families :D
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justKhan22

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #12 on: Jul. 29, 2009, 12:46 AM »

tought time means possibly taking tough actions?
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Muslimah21

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #13 on: Aug. 03, 2009, 10:47 PM »

Yes very true
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brisingr9

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Re: What do you do when you're sad?
« Reply #14 on: Aug. 04, 2009, 03:10 AM »

There is an verse in the holy Quran which says all good is from Allah and all bad is earned by your own doings!!. So when I am depressed I think where have I deviated what went wrong and I remember my creator. I really get very emotional at such times. Well you can't do anything about it ??! Mercy is all we can ask for. May Allah  grant us all mercy  ameeen.
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