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Author Topic: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage  (Read 3994 times)

Ilyas

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Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« on: Oct. 28, 2010, 04:18 AM »

uhh...right.

LUCKNOW: Talaq is no joke. An e-savvy Qatar resident learnt this the hard way when he typed talaq thrice while chatting with his wife on Skype. He says he did not mean it but Dar-ul-Uloom Deoband has ruled that his nikah stands terminated.

That's not all. For his careless 'chat', the man can remarry his divorced wife only after halaala, a practice under which the woman has to marry and divorce another man before she can marry her previous husband again.

Deoband's fatwa section — Dar-ul-Ifta (DuI) — recently received a written request from Qatar, seeking a fatwa on a rather amusing situation. The youth stated that he was recently chatting with his wife on Skype when he typed the word 'talaq' three times, though he did not mean it and asked if his nikah was still valid.

Dar-ul-Ifta shot back that the nikah stands terminated. "When you pronounce talaq three times, it means talaq has taken place, and it does not matter whether the woman has reciprocated or not. Your wife has become 'haraam' for you whether you are aware of the commandment of Islam or not. You neither have the right to take her back nor solemnise new nikah with her without a valid 'halaala'. After the completion of 'iddah' (iddat) period, the woman can marry where she wishes except you," the seminary said.

As per senior Islamic scholars, 'halaala' requires the woman to complete her iddat period of 40 days beginning immediately after talaq. During this period she is supposed to stay away from celebrations and socialising.

At the end of iddat, she would have to marry another man who should then divorce her. She will be required to go through another round of iddat only then would she be eligible to marry her "first husband".

Read more: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage - The Times of India http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/lucknow/Talaq-joke-on-Skype-ends-marriage/articleshow/6818970.cms#ixzz13c81USnO
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JenBean71

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #1 on: Oct. 28, 2010, 05:59 AM »

ya Allah...

What about "intention"?

And if no one knew about the 3x talaq - he knew he didn't mean it and could convey that to his wife and they could get on with their married lives inshaAllah.

What if she is pregnant now and finds out after shes married to another...

which is why talaq should be pronounced once a month for 3 months...

May Allah bring kheir to this situation, ameen!

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jannah

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #2 on: Oct. 28, 2010, 09:44 AM »

wsalam,

that's messed up. why would he say it as a joke that doesn't make sense.  did they have an argument and he said it out of anger? i have heard of guys doing that. and too late they regret it, but it does count. more education needed in this area by those shaikhs i believe.
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Al-Qamar

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #3 on: Oct. 28, 2010, 11:00 AM »

Oh dear... this is easily one of the most misunderstood areas of Islam, because it's hardly taught correctly (in general) and it has slightly unique rules too, given the unique relationship of marriage.

The Prophet (saw) said that there are three matters in which it doesn't matter about your intention; nikah, talaq and taking one's wife back after a revocable divorce (I'm paraphrasing the hadith).

Basically, this means, even if you were joking around about marriage or divorce... so long as the other factors are present, the process has been enacted as far as the shariah is concerned. Thus, for a man to joke about that he's divorcing his wife, it doesn't matter whether he was being serious or not... the fact that he treated it as a joke is sufficiently serious enough to trigger the process.

Here's the scary thing... how many people do you think don't realise this? How many of them are still in a marital relationship, yet they're actually divorced in the eyes of Allah and are thus committing zina? How many children have been born into these relationships? And what will their reaction be on the Day of Judgement when Allah (swt) reveals the true nature of what they have done.

Ignorance about your own religion isn't an excuse!


Now, here's the other misconception about talaq, which is that it has to be pronounced three times. Don't do it!

The correct way to pronounce a talaq is as follows:
  • The wife must not be on her menses
  • The huband must not have been intimate with her since she last came off her menses
  • He must make one clear unequivocable statement of divorce
And that's it... the divorce process starts. For the first and second time, he has until she finishes her third menstrual cycle to revoke it (and he can do this privately himself, he doesn't need to tell her), but it's important to realise that she's still his wife until this time. So she stays in the marital home, and she should try to charm him again.

If it's the third time he's done this, she ceases to be his wife immediately (because he can't revoke that one), so she has to wear the hijab immediately and leave the marital home.

Btw... if any of those rules I've listed above are broken, it doesn't invalidate the talaq. It just means the husband incurs a huge sin for doing it wrong, but the talaq still counts.


Now, there is some confusion as to what happens if the husband makes three statements in one go. Does it count as one divorce, or three? I'm not going through the whole fiqh on it, but suffice to say that at the time of the Prophet (saw), someone said it three times but the Prophet (saw) counted it as one (and the man got reprimanded). But during the time of Umar bin Khattab, because of it being abused, he made three statements at the same time count as three divorces, to stop people playing around with it.

I believe the Hanifi madhab still go with this opinion. I prefer the opinion of counting three as one myself for various reasons. So in this instance, the couple in question could be married... the problem is now due to ignorance they may never know.

(p.s. talaq shouldn't be pronounced once a month for three months either... once it's pronounced, that's it! Unless of course it's revoked later for the first or second time)
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Ilyas

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #4 on: Oct. 30, 2010, 10:09 PM »

Brother Al Qamar,

I believe what Sis Jen meant was the declaration of Talaq should be spread out between the menses to make sure the wife is not pregnant and to give the wife time to woo her husband. You're right however, scholars have ruled pronouncing divorce three times makes it final, joke or not. The hadith that narrates the story of three talaqs counting as one during the Prophet's(saw) time was of a man that meant it to be only one talaq. He said it three times to emphasize talaq but did not intend it to be 3 talaqs. This should be a warning to the rest of the Ummah, talaq is no joke.
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Al-Qamar

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #5 on: Oct. 31, 2010, 01:34 AM »

Assalamu alaykum,

I don't understand how that works, to spread the divorce declaration out over months to ensure the wife isn't pregnant? You're only permitted to issue a divorce in a period of menstrual purity in which you've not slept with your wife (i.e. she's not on her menses, and you've not slept with her since she came off), so thus she wouldn't be pregnant to begin with. And then on top of that, if you DO sleep with her, this is implicitely revoking the divorce...
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JenBean71

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #6 on: Oct. 31, 2010, 03:16 AM »

Asalam alaikum
Brother al-Qamar

Each of the three divorce statements are said at three separate intervals, each in between a wife's menstrual cycle, provided no sexual relations have taken place between the couple.

Brother Ilyas - this is a good topic because it is a wake up call to married brothers not to pronounce divorce in jest or ignorance. Marriage is half our deen. It is easy to get angry and react without considering the consequences and pronounce divorce - or in the case of this article, in jest.

InshaAllah kheir



 

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SalwaR

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #7 on: Feb. 16, 2011, 11:46 PM »

You should not joke about it. All educataed muslims know that.
And even if he had not told anyone, Allh knows so itis haram in the eyes of Allah they remain married, its not just what people think. Just becuase they do not know does not mean you can carry on. Becuase Allah knows.

If you joke about something like that, then you do not have the maturity for marriage, and Allah has made it that its better you not be married to this person. Allah has wisdom behind all that he does. And in that we should trust him and not refutt that choice.
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Al-Qamar

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #8 on: Feb. 17, 2011, 01:09 PM »

All educataed muslims know that.
That's the keyword... educated! Unfortunately a lot are not. I myself didn't know that even to mention it invokes divorce until I went to a course years back. The level of ignorance of basic Islam amongst us is shocking, unfortunately :(
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SalwaR

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Re: Talaq joke on Skype ends marriage
« Reply #9 on: Feb. 17, 2011, 10:14 PM »

I agree, so many people can tell u names of celerities and actors. But if you ask them to name but a few of the prophets compainions they would not be able to. Forget even telling u any events that happend in thier time. To them its history.

Astagfirallah, May Allah forgive us for our ignorance and grat us wisdom and knowladge. ameen
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