Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
|[MADRASA] Is my Friend Sinning? Attending Christmas party and dancing|
|07/14/01 at 01:30:58|
I have a very good friend who attended her works Xmas party and much to
my horror, told me that she danced like *crazy* for 2-3 hours! This is
despite her fasting and praying during Ramadan. Is this a great sin?
Thinking of her swaying her body with other men makes me mad ):(
I know for sure she isn't stupid to go further, but whenever I try
telling her that some things she does are wrong(she doesn't drink, have bfs
or anything like that), she gets aggressive(also a very arrogant
person), accuses me of being 'backward' or 'paindu' and I don't want to say
anything to hurt her and lose a good friend. Shes just very loud, has
many many male friends and open about all things, including those we
would consider too shameful to talk about.
The scary thing is she'll be going to University in a few months and
that means more parties and haram lifestyle.
What can be done?
|Re: Is my Friend Sinning?|
|01/14/01 at 21:16:44|
What your friend needs to understand is that Islam is all about qat'ul asbaab - severing the avenues to haram things. Like for example alcohol - instead of just making alcohol haram, Islam makes hanging out at places that serve alcohol haram, selling alcohol haram, etc etc. And if we think about the reason behind this it's something really wise. It's not to make things difficult for us, it's because you and me, we're human, and it's much easier to just stay away from something completely, than being around it constantly and then having to say no.
It's the same with zinna... instead of just premarital sex being haram, Allah makes certain things that lead up to zinna haram as well, like dating, partying with guys, etc.
Going to something like that indicates a lot of things. I think you should be more worried about her iman, not just what she did for three hours Friday night..
When she calls you backwards, I think it's because she thinks you think a good girl stays home and knits sweaters :) What she needs to realize is that there *is* a way to kick it and still be Muslim. Maybe something you can do to break this image is do something fun as an alternative to this haram stuff. In my community we've had some kickin anti-prom parties, all halal and fun... find something you guys can do that's halal and crazy... sometimes you need to break loose and maybe if there was a way to do that within the bounds of islam, she'd do that instead of doing what she's doing..
Another thing, there are definite consequences to doing stuff like this, especially in college, *especially* at frat parties... man subhanAllah we're studying statistics of rape and assault cases in colleges in my sociology class... so scary.. something like 50% of college guys said they would rape a woman if they knew they wouldn't get caught.
We need to realize who we're dealing with here... if people have no taqwa what's keeping them in line? Parties like that are dangerous, alcohol + no conscience = a person who is capable of anything. Be careful out there my sisters..
I hope your friend inshaAllah figures out what she's doing..
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