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|How to cry?|
|06/08/05 at 17:39:37|
I've been having problems for many years with personal illness and other issues and can't
ever seem to cry. My father also died recently and mother is now going through hardship.
I don't have many friends and the few that I have, I hardly ever see or speak to.
Everyone has moved on in life but I'm stuck because of my illness. My life is a wreck, I have no
confidence and my faith in God is at an all time low. There is so much frustration and
pain inside me and I feel like crying so many times but cannot do so. Its causing anxiety
and panic attacks. I feel like i'm about to explode. I dont wish to see a doctor as they
cannot cure the underlying problems, which are now impossible. What should I do? Is there
any dua i can recite even when low in faith?
|incurable illness, lost hope|
|06/08/05 at 22:18:21|
|[slm] I am sorry to hear of your health and other problems. May Allah (swt) cure you completely and grant you the best in both worlds. aameen|
Your case of hardship is not unique. We all go through some misfortune, and at one time I too thought that life was nothing but a series of suffering circumstances. But that is only Satan trying to keep us from going to Allah (swt).
[quote]I dont wish to see a doctor as they †cannot cure the underlying problems, which are now impossible.[/quote]
Well, doctors do not cure. It is Allah who does, but we are encouraged to use physical means. And who told you that cure is now impossible? The prophet [saw] told us that there is cure for everything (except old age) in honey and Black seeds.
I have many chronic illnesses, and I have been told there is no cure, and that has been since my childhood, yet Allah has given me enough respite (if not a cure) to be able to lead a normal life. Theer have been miraculous cures in the past, and if my illnesses have come back, it is my own fault.
Have you read the story of Ayyoob alehis Salam? Is your condition worse than his? Recite the dua he made:
Rabbi inni massaniyyaddurru wa anta arhamurRahimeen
[s]—» «šŪ „”šŪ «Š÷— ś «š őŪ—«Š—«Õ„Ūš[/s]
—» «šŪ „”šŪ «Š÷— ś «š «Š—Õ„ «Š—«Õ„Ūš
Read Surah Fatiha. It is a ruqqayya for illnesses. Between the Sunnah and the Fard rakaat of Fajr, say the duroode Ibrahimi (the one we say in tashshahud, Allahaumma Sallai `alaa ....). and then recite Surah Fatiha 41 times, then say this durood again. Then blow your breath on yourself or the person who is chronically ill. Concentrate on this and do not speak any other word during this time of recitation. After this you can go about your business.
Inshallah all will be well.
For crying, think of the time we will al be standing in front of Allah, without anything to protect us, or anyone to help us. All alone to answer for ourselves. Do you know that losing hope is also kufr? We will be questioned on that too. Think of Hell. Try to hold a burning match to your palm. Can you stand it? So think of all that could befall us. I am sure tears will come to your eyes.
You see whenever I read Surah Yaseen, and come across the words:
Ū« Õ”—… ŕŠž «Šŕ»«Ō
ya hasratan `alal ibaad
I shudder, and teras come to my eyes. Allah (swt) is saying this about those of His creation who refused to listen to His prophets. What will befall them, can you imagine?
Read the Quran and see where Allah says certain people are doomed. Seek Allah's forgiveness, and help, and try to cry to attract His Mercy.
May Allah grant you complete cure, and give you happiness here and in the Hereafter
|06/10/05 at 08:59:44|
|06/09/05 at 14:01:30|
My heart goes out to you and my duas too. Please donít lose hope and donít ever despair. Allah (SWT) is the Greatest and Most Merciful:
Allah (SWT) Most High said, a servant who advances towards Me by a handís breadth, I advance towards him by an armís length. And if he advances towards Me by an armís length, I advance towards him by the span of outstretched arms. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him running. (Related by al-Bukhari according to Anas).
"God is with those who believe." (Qur'an 3:68) What is it that we say ďUnconditional loveĒ.
Ibn Al-Qayyim said with regards to what one should do to cure his weak Iman using the Quran, "First you should remove your heart from the life of this world and settle it in the Last Life. Then, pay your full attention to pursuing the meanings of the Quran, and try to comprehend and understand them and what they were sent down to accomplish. Then, offer these meanings to the sickness that your heart feels, and when they touch the disease, they will cure the heart, Allah willing."
Once you start having faith in Allah (SWT), you will see life in a whole new manner, a whole new light. Life is test in itís entirety. We are all tested in different ways and some may seem much harsher than the other, but Allah (SWT) knows whatís best for us and He (SWT) knows our weaknesses and strengths and He (SWT) does not burden more than His (SWT) Believer can handle.
There were times in my life where I thought I have failed, but talking to Him (SWT), asking Him (SWT) for guidance, I knew that even if I died trying, I truly havenít failed. Iíve failed if I died and not try.
There is this story about a man who was tested by Allah (SWT). Allah (SWT) gave him a dream that he needed to push this huge boulder. So every day and night, he pushed this huge boulder, but it did not move. Weeks, months, and years went by, he tried to move it, but couldnít. Then one night he was visited by Satan who tried to convince him that he no longer needed to push the boulder. Why keep pushing it if itís not going to move. Heís just wasting his time with it. With that in mind, with the very little faith he had in Allah (SWT), he asked Him (SWT) why did He (SWT) wanted him to push it when He knew that he couldnít move it. What is the point? He did not understand. Allah (SWT) told him that though He asked him to push it, He did not tell him to move it. Every day and night that he did try, he gained physical strength and now he understood that all that Allah (SWT) wanted him to do was listen and obey and the rest not to worry about it because Allah (SWT) would take care of the rest. And of course, with the little faith he had in Allah (SWT), he still had faith and now itís even stronger than ever before because he kept on PUSHing (Pray Until Something Happens.)
Thereís a better version of this story somewhere in this forum. I always have faith in Allah (SWT), but sometimes Satan wants to get the better of me and I feel that he is succeeding, I know I need to become a stronger Muslim and so I go somewhere (if the weather permits) or stay at home in my room and read the Qurían and pray and ask Allah (SWT) for more guidance and more mercy. And I do this for days until my heart is at ease. One time, it took me years. Sometimes weeks or months. But I donít give up cause then Iídíve failed. I know Allah (SWT) is there for me and with His (SWT) guidance and mercy, He (SWT) wonít let me fail.
Speaking from experience, despair only leads to failure. Allah (SWT) will help you, just keep PUSHing.
Allah (SWT) blessÖ.
|Cure for the heart|
|06/10/05 at 08:39:36|
[quote author=Trustworthy link=board=madrasa;num=1118266777;start=0#2 date=06/09/05 at 14:01:30]
Ibn Al-Qayyim said with regards to what one should do to cure his weak Iman using the Quran, "First you should remove your heart from the life of this world and settle it in the Last Life. Then, pay your full attention to pursuing the meanings of the Quran, and try to comprehend and understand them and what they were sent down to accomplish. Then, offer these meanings to the sickness that your heart feels, and when they touch the disease, they will cure the heart, Allah willing."[/quote]
Alhumdullilah, very well said sister. To the anonymous poster I'd like to suggest that you read this thread as well, as it talks a little bit about the Quran and how it helps put the heart at ease.
p.s. Timbuktu, 41 times? How did you get this number.
|correction, and ruqayyah|
|06/10/05 at 09:05:58|
In my previous quote there was a mistake in quoting the dua, I ahve now corrected it. May Allah (swt) forgive me.
[quote]Timbuktu, 41 times? †How did you get this number.[/quote]
You are quite right to question that. I haven't come across this in any Hadith, but my mother uses it, and I think I may have found it in some collections of latter day shuyookh. I think it is OK to use it, because Surah Fatiha is a ruqayya, the Quran is shifa, and the number of times does not exceed the maximum number (100) that the prophet [saw] is reported in Sahih Hadith to have recited or recommended.
|See a doctor!|
|06/10/05 at 13:21:36|
Anonymous, I would strongly suggest that you see a doctor. Inability to cry can be a symptom of physical as well as psychological disorders that may be treat-able.
|How to cry?|
|06/12/05 at 12:05:14|
sister anonymous, please send me an email inshAllah so that we can talk. take care,
|( Re: How to cry? )|
|06/16/05 at 11:42:53|
It is very hard dealing with a long term illness. †It can be overwhelming because you wonder when it will ever end, and when you will be able to return to "normal". †
I think it helps to think in terms of that this state you are in right now is "normal" for you.
Perhaps you just need to develop some coping strategies to deal with your symptoms, which will allow you to do more things. †Pacing is one very good strategy.
Also, dealing specifically with your inability to cry. †
Sometimes some of us can develop a lot of emotional baggage over the years. †Emotions are very useful for us, but when they are not discharged properly we build up a lot of baggage. †You may need to find a way to offload this, so you can feel emotionally healthy again.
You can research and try different methods to discover which is most useful for you. †Counselling or talking therpaies help a lot. †Also relaxtion techniques and mediation also help. †Autogenic therapy is a really good one you might want to try.
And of course, prayer really gives us strenght too, alhamdulillah.
Inshallah, hope you feel better able to cope with your situation.
|06/16/05 at 11:45:41|
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