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UmmWafi
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« on: Oct 13, 2008 03:37 PM »


 salaam

Bismillah, I seek protection from Allah against 'ujub and riya'.

Dear Brothers and Sisters

I have been on this board for some number of years now. Sometimes I was here often and sometimes I would be away for ages.  Still, coming back here has always been pleasurable because I know I can learn some new things and more importantly, bask in the ukhuwah that has always characterised jannah.org.

That is not to say that things have always been rosy. Sure, being imperfect, we have had our share of ups and downs, members who were banned, brothers and sisters who left because they were upset and so on. I admit, I too have made some mistakes. I once even hurt sis Halima and am so grateful that was resolved.  I cannot speak for Sis Halima but for me, the matter was resolved quick because there wasn't any shu' dzan against Sis Halima on my part. I didnt stress on the difference, rather I focus on the fact that we were sisters and we were strained and that hurt.

Jannah put in a lot of effort into this message board and her intentions and reasons for the efforts are all noble and good. I think we should respect that. In order to respect that, I think we should help her keep the spirit of the board alive and well. We can do that by agreeing to differ, without resorting to hostility, and worse still, name calling.

We all quote the Prophet SAW when it is convenient for our arguments but we do not follow his examples. And by we all, I include me first in the list of transgressors. Our beloved Prophet is such a gentle forgiving man who told us to make excuses for our brothers and sisters instead of condemn. Yet, something as simple as that...became something so difficult.

It is a sad day when a Muslim calls another Muslim with a vile adjective. Its a sad day when a Muslim makes a light observation and was labelled arrogant. Worse of all, its a sad day when a Muslim feels so oppressed by the hostility that she feels unable to share her opinions and ideas, for fear of being attacked.

Please, we none of us are sheikhs or ulama's. We may know what some sheikhs or ulama's said, but we are not them. We are not qualified to make claims of intellectual superiority against another poster. Regardless of how highly we consider our educational achievements, we must remember something; we dont know what the educational qualification of the other poster nor do we have a true understanding if his/her knowledge abilities. Maybe the poster choose not to reveal, out of modesty or due to other reasons. Its a great tragedy when we claim to come here to learn yet we shut the knowledge out by our own ignorance.

Let us try something new. Let us read a post, disagree and decide to disagree with adab. Let us just try that. For once.

Please forgive me where I have offend. This is just a plea from a tired sister. Inshallah...I will start all that I propose with myself.

Wassalam.


Fozia
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« Reply #1 on: Oct 13, 2008 04:52 PM »

salam

I have to say, one of the things that really appeal to me about this board is that there is a level of decorum  that is generally maintained, we disagree but most are very polite in our disagreements.

Goodness, I thought I was the only one who had really upset a poster, and when I realised how bad it looked I apologised to her immediately, my humour tends not to translate very well on discussions forums at times.
I was most grateful the sister was forgiving and very sweet.



Wassalaam

And when My servants question thee concerning Me, then surely I am nigh. I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me. So let them hear My call and let them trust in Me, in order that they may be led aright. Surah 2  Verse 186
Sr.Kathy
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« Reply #2 on: Oct 14, 2008 12:27 PM »

What is "shu' dzan?"

"Allah surely knows the warmth of every teardrop... " Jaihoon
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« Reply #3 on: Oct 14, 2008 05:15 PM »

 jazakallahukhairan

That is exactly what I would like to say. I wish everyone would read this. In fact I'm going to make it a sticky for awhile.
Halima
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« Reply #4 on: Oct 14, 2008 06:41 PM »

salaam

That is not to say that things have always been rosy. Sure, being imperfect, we have had our share of ups and downs, members who were banned, brothers and sisters who left because they were upset and so on. I admit, I too have made some mistakes. I once even hurt sis Halima and am so grateful that was resolved.  I cannot speak for Sis Halima but for me, the matter was resolved quick because there wasn't any shu' dzan against Sis Halima on my part. I didnt stress on the difference, rather I focus on the fact that we were sisters and we were strained and that hurt.

Oh Sis UmmWafi!  You made me cry tears of understanding and respect.  Our issue was way, way back many centuries ago!  We both forgave each other and that is what counts!  Even siblings fight!  Forgiveness is the key and virtue here.  Even Allah SWT forgives his servants!  I wish I could find/retrieve the hadith of the gentleman who never went to sleep without forgiving all those who have wronged him, every night!  Allah SWT gave him a place in Paradise!

I wholeheartedly agree with your sentiments.  I hope we all learn to respect each other, be kind to each other and understand each other. More importantly, say "sorry" sincerely when we hurt someone - intentionally or unintentionally.  Human is to error.

Shukran.

Halima

The Almighty Allah says,

"When a servant thinks of Me, I am near.
When he invokes Me, I am with him.
If he reflects on Me in secret, I reply in secret,
And if he acknowledges Me in an assembly,
I acknowledge him in a far superior assembly."

- Prophet Muhammad (SAW), as reptd by Abu Huraira
UmmWafi
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« Reply #5 on: Oct 15, 2008 05:03 AM »

Salam Sis Kathy

Shu'dzan is when we harbour negative thought, intentions or suppositions against another. When we suspect ill of another person.

Allahu 'alim

Wassalam
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