// Raising sons and daughters
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Author Topic: Raising sons and daughters  (Read 1268 times)
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Anonymous
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« on: Jun 30, 2010 03:23 PM »


Assalamo elikuim
For parents or future parents, would your style of parenting be different for sons and daughters? I am not talking about boys allowed to do everything bad but girls arent even allowed to do regular stuff Smiley Halal and haram are defined by Allah swt and they are obligatory on both .

I am talking more on the lines that would you do extra for your daughters. e.g. my 15 year old son is volunteering in downtown, since its few more miles from where I work, in the morning I drop him at the local train station to go and come back from his job. I was just thinking that if that would have been my daughter, I might have taken more extra efforts to drop her at the place instead of her letting ride the train. Similarly sometimes my sons have to wait longer to be picked(or walk longer Smiley ) but I know if it would have been my daughters , they would have been picked right on time Smiley Boys are given more chores to do since they are boys and need to tough up .

What do you guys do? For Fun no haters please:)

Anonymous
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« Reply #1 on: Jul 01, 2010 12:35 PM »

Asalaamu Alaikum bro

Quote
For parents or future parents, would your style of parenting be different for sons and daughters?

What an interesting question!!

I’ve been trying to rack my brains as to what I would think would be an appropriate response but in all honesty I think I’m none the wiser.  idunno


Instead here are a few thoughts:


1. There may be no one size fits all answer to this question because children differ as well as their environments so what may work for a daughter in the US may not apply to a son in the Middle East.

2. How one treats their son or daughter will very much depend on the personalities of the children involved. Some daughters can be very ‘manly’ and some sons can be very ‘girly’ (in an emotional not physical sense bro ) and hence one’s interaction should be tailored accordingly.

3. There is a natural desire for parents to wish the best for their children but a balance must be maintained between keeping boundaries for our children in order to protect them, and stifling and preventing them from developing their own personalities, thoughts and expressions.

Extremes at either side of this balance could potentially cause a whole raft of problems for both parents and their children as they get older.



Ultimately we all wish our children to mature into righteous Muslims with the appropriate knowledge and life skills to be able to partake in the world and, inshaAllah, our children will recognise that we, as parents, did everything we could to make that happen.


As ever Allah knows best, but it would be interesting to hear the views of others. bro
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