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Author Topic: Guide to Being a Gentleman PDF guide for guys!  (Read 11708 times)
jannah
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« on: Mar 03, 2009 10:21 AM »


omygosh I don't know how I found this i laffed and laffed yet... wow... guys you totally need this, please READ and LEARN!!

http://artofmanliness.com/wp-content/free_ebook.PDF

Here is a little excerpt from the "Dress and Appearance" section:

Quote
Most American men look like slobs. They take no
care for their appearance when out in public. Proper
dress and appearance does not make you a pansy or
a metrosexual. A man can look gentlemanly and still
maintain his rugged edge.

The general rule for men’s dress and grooming is to
let the dress suit the occasion. It would be absurd to
show up at a formal event in jeans and a t-shirt.
Likewise, a man would look very odd dressed to the
nines for an outing out in the woods.

Simplicity. Simplicity. Simplicity. Any attempt to be conspicuous is in
bad taste. Never wear much jewelry or any article of clothing
conspicuous on account of its money value. Simplicity should always
preside over a gentleman’s wardrobe.

Follow fashion enough to avoid looking odd, but avoid the extremes
of current trends. Keep your clothes updated with the current
fashions. However, avoid trends. A gentleman would never be
caught dead in girl jeans or a trucker hat. Stick with a classic
wardrobe and you’ll never go wrong. A young man may follow the
trends further than an older man, but let him avoid going to the
extremes, if he were not to be taken as an empty headed fop.
Use little cologne. Excessive cologne is in bad taste. Avoid childish
body sprays and invest in a decent cologne.

Practice impeccable oral hygiene. Brush your teeth thoroughly at
least twice a day. A white smile and clean smelling breath does
wonders in making yourself presentable. Invest in a tongue scraper.
Most bad breath is caused by build up on the tongue. Carry gum
and mints with you and use them throughout the day.

Shave daily. If you shave, do it daily. Nothing makes the face look
sadder as chin covered in short stubble. Of course, there are times
when facial stubble is appropriate and looks good on a gentleman.
For example, stubble while camping or engaging in any other
outdoor activity is perfectly acceptable and in many cases is
extremely attractive to the fairer sex.

Keep your beard;or moustache neatly trimmed. Unruly facial hair
growth is unattractive. Keep yours trimmed. Beard and moustache
styles should be adopted to suit the face.

Hair should be kept neat and simple. Make frequent visits to the
barber in order to trim the hair on your neck and around your ears
in order to maintain a neat appearance. If you wear your hair long,
be sure to wash your hair thoroughly. Longer hair is harder to
clean. Find a style that is simple.

Clip your nails; don’t bite them. Like it or not, women are checking
out your hands. Make sure nails don’t have any signs of nibble
marks. Always use a nail clipper to trim nails.
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UBAB
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« Reply #1 on: Mar 03, 2009 02:43 PM »

This begs the question, "Is chivalry dead?" (Especially among Muslim Men)
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blackrose
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« Reply #2 on: Mar 03, 2009 06:32 PM »

AFter reading this it seems like my soon to be ex was pretty much right on dress and appearance.

my son says he wants to be a business man . hes wearing pants with a nice shirt tucked in and tshirt underneath. He just asked me to fasten his watch and stuck a phone in his pocket. hes just trying to look like his dad:(
hes pretending hes going to store to work. 

he understands we cant go bak but now his hope is on his dad coming here Sad Sad Sad  he pretends his dad is calling him and telling him to come bak :'( >:(makes me  Angry at his dad Angry

sorry for changing subject
neway UBAB your question reminded me of this song:

Chivalry is Not Dead by Kareem Salama (cant find it in youtube)

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UBAB
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« Reply #3 on: Mar 03, 2009 06:53 PM »

I didn't know Kareem Salama had another CD - Funny you mention him ... I was playing the "This Life of Mine" CD in my car yesterday to my out of town guest who produces Muslim documentaries, for his future reference.

I'll see if they are selling it at the local Islamic stores anymore.

There are examples of the Prophets who displayed Chivalry in the proper context:

The Prophet Musa / Moses never  walked behind a lady - this was a sign of great respect. When he sat at the well and saw to the two sisters holding back their herd until he intervene on their behalf - one of the most noblest acts he did was when he was invited back to their fathers home, he told them to tell him where to go, and that they should follow behind him.  Zipporah / Safoorah / Sephora and her sister noted this about his character to be different among men. Safoorah eventually married the Prophet Musa.

Prophet Muhammad (saw) would always introduce his wife in a public setting so that all everyone would know their relationship as halal one during the age of ignorance.

With respect to your son, inshallah you'll find a good Muslim role model he can look up to.
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« Reply #4 on: Mar 03, 2009 07:22 PM »

Its a song from his first cd
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UBAB
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« Reply #5 on: Mar 03, 2009 09:17 PM »

I found the song on this web site:

http://www.kareemsalama.com/

You can listen to the first 1/3 of the song on the top right corner of the site by pressing the backward button once, they even have the lyrics...


 thobebro
Chivalry's Not Dead
(K. Salama)

They say that chivalry’s dead but I see chivalry every day
I see men holding doors open for their ladies standing in the rain
They say all the good men are gone with the wind but I see good men all the time
I see fellas helping friends pay their rent and the bills that got behind
(Chorus)

And I wanna keep it alive
To be good to my mama and good to my wife
So when folks say there aint no noble men left
They’ll look at me and know…they’ll know…chivalry’s not dead
As long as we try to keep it alive
Chivalry’s not dead


There’s men that lose it all and got mouths to feed and they’re patient through it all
He holds his hands up high and his head real low as he whispers a prayer to God
If there’s any doubt about the men we’ve got or the men of recent times
Remember Malcom and Nelson and Martin and Hanson spoke truth through all the lies

(Chorus)

And I wanna keep it alive
To be good to my mama and good to my wife
So when folks say there aint no noble men left
They’ll look at me and know
They’ll know
Chivalry’s not dead
As long as we try to keep it alive
Chivalry’s not dead
It’s gonna survive as long as we try
Chivalry’s not dead

(Bridge)

I see firefighters rushing into the blaze
And I see Oklahoma cowboys kissing their babes
And aint saying we don’t need a few more
But the ones that try I don’t wanna ignore

(Chorus)

And I wanna keep it alive
To be good to my mama and good to my wife
So when folks say there aint no noble men left
They’ll look at me and know
They’ll know
Chivalry’s not dead
Chivalry’s not dead
Chivalry’s not dead

Be the Chivalry you wanna see widespread and the reason the skeptics say
Chivalry’s not dead
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BrKhalid
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« Reply #6 on: Mar 05, 2009 10:29 AM »

Asalaamu Alaikum  bro


This reminded me of that Good Wives Guide we had a few years ago.  bro


Quote
This begs the question, "Is chivalry dead?" (Especially among Muslim Men)


I think I mentioned this in Br nuh’s thread in the Brothers only section that there are probably great swathes of Muslim men who are chivalrous but who don’t like to admit the fact.  Wink
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Sr.Kathy
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« Reply #7 on: Mar 05, 2009 01:21 PM »

  arabbro I am starting to see it in Ali... it seems to be happening overnight. Subhanna Allah.

 Wink Ladies... I am starting to take possible requests of marriage....
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« Reply #8 on: Mar 05, 2009 03:20 PM »

salam


You know it's just occurred to me, oneday my girls are going to leave me, you're so lucky mashallah, you have a son and he'll probably stick around or at least be close to you, you'll gain a daughter..... my house will merely contain the echos of my childrens footsteps from long ago... :'(

  arabbro I am starting to see it in Ali... it seems to be happening overnight. Subhanna Allah.

 Wink Ladies... I am starting to take possible requests of marriage....



Wassalaam
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tq
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« Reply #9 on: Mar 05, 2009 03:30 PM »

Assalamo elikuim

Sr.Fozia I am sure you have heard of this
"A son is a son till he gets married where as a daughter always remains a daughter"

I have seen so many times that although parents  live with son but its the daughters who are trully taking care of their parents.
Also you never know Inshalah you will get wonderful son-in-law who would love to live with you Smiley. When you find one like that send his brother my way Smiley


Wasalam
tq
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blackrose
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« Reply #10 on: Mar 06, 2009 07:49 AM »

Quote
have seen so many times that although parents  live with son but its the daughters who are trully taking care of their parents.

my aunt and uncle were extremely strict on their daughters and allowed toooo much freedom to their sons. Now both of their daughters are married and the ones that are really taking care of them.
And they always say what tq just said here.

awwww Fozia comeon, maaan my lawyer keeps telling me that it doesnt matter if you are the best mother and your husband is the worst father boys usually by twelve want to live w fathers:( 90 percent of time
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Fozia
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« Reply #11 on: Mar 06, 2009 09:29 AM »

salam


Don't listen to your lawyer.


awwww Fozia comeon, maaan my lawyer keeps telling me that it doesnt matter if you are the best mother and your husband is the worst father boys usually by twelve want to live w fathers:( 90 percent of time

My little brother is an absolute darling but he turned down a good job because it would be far from my parents and they have no one else to care for them (in a big macho way).

I hope my girls remain close to me even when I'm old and annoying, and no longer able to kiss their fears away.



Wassalaam
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« Reply #12 on: Mar 06, 2009 08:49 PM »

The way the world is changing nowadays I don't think you'll be losing your children inshaAllah. Everyone is so connected even if they live halfway around the world.

As for the mother's with sons, I can totally tell when a guy has a strong, balanced mother that has taught him gentlemanly ways. Totally always. From hanging up his jacket to helping out with cleaning up and sooo many other things, even in attitude. So good job moms! InshaAllah the next generation of bros will be much better than this one Wink

 bro arabbeardbro malaybro arabbro sudanibro desibro

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BrKhalid
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« Reply #13 on: Mar 09, 2009 11:55 AM »

Asalaamu Alaikum  bro


Quote
As for the mother's with sons, I can totally tell when a guy has a strong, balanced mother that has taught him gentlemanly ways. Totally always. From hanging up his jacket to helping out with cleaning up and sooo many other things, even in attitude. So good job moms!


This is actually a very important point.


Anecdotally, you hear so many stories of sons being given more freedom / slack (by their own mothers) than daughters which undoubtedly results in a particular way of behavior when these sons become husbands and fathers.


Mothers really have a crucial role in teaching their sons good manners and conduct and the fact that they may also have daughters should not absolve this responsibility.


Quote
InshaAllah the next generation of bros will be much better than this one Wink


Ouch!! Lol
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« Reply #14 on: Mar 09, 2009 04:23 PM »

salaam

I totally agree with mothers raising their boys right but we have to also remember that fathers have a crucial part on this because boys look up to their fathers and want to be like them
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jannah
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« Reply #15 on: Jan 12, 2010 05:38 AM »

Posting this as the link above is now dead.

lol just read the "gentleman don't poke" part under Facebook again... this thing is hysterical  Cheesy
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« Reply #16 on: Feb 19, 2010 02:07 PM »

Salaams,

salam

You know it's just occurred to me, oneday my girls are going to leave me, you're so lucky mashallah, you have a son and he'll probably stick around or at least be close to you, you'll gain a daughter..... my house will merely contain the echos of my childrens footsteps from long ago... :'(

Wassalaam

Or you can always import a son from indo-pak, who can stay with you. I know that many men wouldn't like to live with their in-laws, but one can always support a good hobo for some time  bro
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« Reply #17 on: Feb 20, 2010 11:29 AM »

salam

I dont think so, overwhelmingly men from back home, generally marry for a passport if they marry non residents, the good ones are always quickly snapped up by the residents.
Salaams,

salam

You know it's just occurred to me, oneday my girls are going to leave me, you're so lucky mashallah, you have a son and he'll probably stick around or at least be close to you, you'll gain a daughter..... my house will merely contain the echos of my childrens footsteps from long ago... :'(

Wassalaam

Or you can always import a son from indo-pak, who can stay with you. I know that many men wouldn't like to live with their in-laws, but one can always support a good hobo for some time  bro

My girls are far too precious to me to even consider that, I am content with Allahs bounties Alhumdulillah.




Wassalaaam
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« Reply #18 on: Apr 13, 2011 08:18 PM »

Hey, thanks alot! I'll check it out!
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