// Anonymous ? for the bros
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Anonymous
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« Reply #50 on: Oct 13, 2008 02:21 PM »

Lazy teenagers or active "any agers" will turn a clean home into a disaster area in the blink of an eye.  I've cleaned one level of the house and moved onto the next and then gone back ito the first only to find stuff out of place again; yet not actually see who is responsible.   Huh?    I can spend all day doing laundry and within an hour find another pile that mysteriously appeared yet no one can tell me where it was when I was doing laundry.  Now that it's just my son at home let's see if things change.

But yes it is completely unfair for one spouse to be at home all day but expect the one that works all day to come home and do everything inside the home too.  Yet the working woman is expected to do it - and with a smile on her face.  I know women are more skilled at multi-tasking and some of us are masters at "super mega multi-tasking" but it is exhausting.

Anonymous
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« Reply #51 on: Oct 13, 2008 11:19 PM »

I'm wondering if the actual question about what do brothers actually want has been answered or is it still remaining a mystery as the thread has permanately shifted to "the issues with sisters that want to get married are......".
Anonymous
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« Reply #52 on: Oct 14, 2008 06:32 AM »

I'm wondering if the actual question about what do brothers actually want has been answered or is it still remaining a mystery as the thread has permanately shifted to "the issues with sisters that want to get married are......".


It hasn't been answered and I'd like to know too. (I think the brothers are too scared to come in here?)
Anonymous
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« Reply #53 on: Oct 14, 2008 08:12 AM »

Oh sorry:
“It hasn't been answered and I'd like to know too. (I think the brothers are too scared to come in here?)”
I probably miss understood what was being asked:

Each brother wants a different thing. If you are rejected by a brother you don’t have what that brother wants, or you have it but you haven’t been able to get him to understand that you have what he wants.
I think the same thing applies to women, different women want different things too.

The point that I was trying to make was some women want something that doesn’t exist, and others want something that can not exist.
I’m speaking as a brother who has been delegated to find husbands for people. And some women put such conditions that are impossible to fulfil. You will not get married if they do that. And the longer you delay the harder it will be to find a husband.
I’m not being nasty, and I know allot of people here think I am and I’m known as the board’s resident nasty male traditionalist. I’m not even justifying how men feel or say I feel like this. But I’m just trying to state the facts.
You will not get married if you don’t offer men what they want.
Just as men who don’t have or don’t offer women what they want will not get married.

It is true, for most men the most important thing is what the woman looks like. There are other issues but they are secondary to this one. And there isn’t anything you can do about it if you don’t fulfil that criteria other then accept that rejection and move on to the next male.
If you are not attractive then you have to choose from the fewer men who don’t see attractiveness as a major issue.

But you have to keep in mind that unlike women most men interview multiple women at the same time. Out of those that accept that man, the man selects who he considers as the best on offer.
So you are competing with others. Your point isn’t to show that you will make an acceptable wife, but show that you will make a better one than any other that is on offer to that male.

“Lazy teenagers or active "any agers”
Yes that is true. But the main reason men prefer younger girls is if you get them young enough you can mould them in to what you want.
If you want someone with n existent characteristics. You will not be able to find them readymade. You will have to catch them young and slowly mould them over time remembering not to break them with quick changes.


“Who's joking about the role reversal scenario”
If you state this during the interview or even if the male smells the possibility of this it would be an instant rejection.
If the person being married is a student, you could see it as an investment. What he earns when he works would be yours anyway. And because you are older he would be earning for you after you retire if you manage to keep him.

“16 year old males aren't attractive”
True, but you have to think of it as an investment. In two years time he would be 18, in four 20. As he is still growing the food which you feed him will also be an investment. The more you feed him the more he’d grow.
My aunt and uncle were teenagers when they were married. When my granddad showed him to my aunt she said something similar. He said give me 6 months. My granddad filled his fridge with high protean food and built a gym in his cellar. In six months time he had turned a skinny short boy into a well built tall man ready for the wedding day.
You have to think past the wedding day in to the rest of your lives the way men do. As you lose your attractiveness your teenage husband will gain in it. You have to see things as an investment.
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #54 on: Oct 14, 2008 09:27 AM »

salam

That's about the most sensible post so far on this thread.

I personally don't think there's anything wrong with anyone rejecting a proposal on the basis of looks, you have to find your future spouse attractive. And it is wholly dependant on the individual, one mans plain Jane can be another mans dream woman, tis all very subjective.

I still wouldn't touch a teenager with a barge pole, unless I were a teen myself in which case the closeness in age would probably even itself out eventually altho 16 is too young for a boy to be married imo. and I'm old and jaded enough to be talking about emotional and intellectual maturity, not physical looks, which I do know will change

I really do not think however, that anyone should get married to someone who will contribute nothing to a marriage even if it is supposed to be for only a short period of time (habits once developed are very hard to break), ie if someone thinks they will be sitting around all day, whilst their better half will be working, cooking, cleaning, paying all the bills. Then seriously they should stay at home with their mothers who created these monsters be they male or female.
Moereover I think the person should state that this is what they intend to do at the interview point, for example; 'As I am studying, and I find it beneath me to cook, clean or generally pick up after myself,  I will not do it, as I do not drive and will have no money anyway, you will also be expected to do all the shopping, and pay my maintenance until such a time as I graduate, and find a job suited to me, at which point I may contribute to future household bills, but till then you will do everything, and I expect to be named co-owner of any property purchased during our marriage regardlesss of my monetary contribution....' Attractive prospective be they male or female?

Marriages work only if both parties are willing to contribute, sacrifice, compromise and above all if both people recognise the fact that their spouse is a thinking feeling individual who will feel hurt and happiness at the same things that the husband/wife would. Treat eachother as you would your closest friend otherwise it just wont work.



Wassalaam
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #55 on: Oct 14, 2008 12:28 PM »

Indeed "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" or it should be but reality shows that the beholder's opinion is based on what others think.  So if the standard of "beauty' shifted to 'bald and missing teeth" then suddenly all those that fell into that category would be in demand.  But the standard of beauty has been set to "supermodel" which - newsflash - most supermodels are unattractive without all the makeup.  So is the standard "painted pony"?

Marriage is part investment and part gamble.  What one gets initially may not be what remains.  These days investments are risky and you never get a high return on investment.  There are too many stories of men who were in school while their wives worked and then when it was the wife's turn to study the husband either convinced her that the time still wasn't right or he left her for someone else; so what return on investment did the woman get?  Nothing.  Only maturity of mind and ideals can lead to making wise and sound decisions that are based on reason and not hormones.  All those that rejected me lost out and I'm not concerned about them; as is said "you reap what you sow" so if their lives aren't all bliss it's not my problem (but do admit I laugh a little.)

My dad is "Mr. Old Country" personified but even he hasn't come up with hardline rules that I need to adhere to; maybe he's mellowed in his old age or he's finally figured out that some things have to change or that I'm just as tough as he is and it's his fault.  No matter really. 

Anonymous
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« Reply #56 on: Oct 15, 2008 01:32 AM »

I didn’t mean 16 literally. I just choose it as an arbitrary age to mean younger because it is the youngest age someone can legally be married in the UK.
In your country it maybe older or younger.
I didn’t really mean student literally either. What I meant was a young man who is just getting started, not necessarily a student. So maybe someone earning minimum age while working minimum hours?

I don’t think it is a good idea for the woman to sign over any of her property whoever pays the bills. I don’t think it has an Islamic precedence. I think it is more to do with the Christian tradition of the woman being the husband’s property and the marriage lasting for ever as a pair. While in Islam marriage is just a contract.

But when it comes to who you choose it is your choice. You just have to understand the more choosey you get, the less likely you are of being married. But you don’t have to get married at all, so it is still up to you.

Anyway who am I to give advice I’ve been trying to get my ********* married off for * years and have had no luck. So I can tell you what not to do, which I have already done. But I can’t really tell you what to do, because if I knew that I would have already found her an acceptable husband.
But come to think of it, it wasn’t really a case of males not liking her. It was more of a case of her asking me to find them. I find, describe and she rejects without even a meeting. I think it is due to fear of the unknown when it comes to suitable partners and out right rejection of unsuitable.
So (same age divorced), why did he divorce? Will he do it to me after marriage? Rejection.
(Same age not divorced), why would he want to marry me when he can get someone younger without kids? Rejection.
(Older never married), too old, rejection.
(Younger never married), why would he want me. Will he divorce after he finds some one younger?
Rejection.
Only one got to the interview stage, and that wasn’t found by me anyway.
So my best advice is seeking better advice.
But for some reason I get the feeling that it isn’t all the faults of all the men you (plural) have had interviews with. Because if it got to the interview stage, they knew the facts about you, if they saw photos they knew what you looked like already. So you had a chance otherwise they wouldn’t have agreed to an interview. So what blow it?
If you work it out, the next interview would be successful Inshallah.

Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #57 on: Oct 15, 2008 02:24 AM »

One of the suggestions seems interesting.  Since brothers have the tendency to have several sisters lined up and then choose from among the pool of candidates then sisters should do the same thing rather than try the slow one at a time approach.  Seems fair to me and certainly maximizes the energy that is expended in the exhaustive process.
Anonymous
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« Reply #58 on: Oct 15, 2008 06:26 AM »

  bisms assalamualaikumeye lets take a better look at this. the first thing should be done is to ask Allah. Because Allah has said in the Quran that they plan and Allah plan and Allah is the best in planers. so I think anyone how don't do this will have mess up. in this life or the next and Allah know best and if I have said something worg it's from me and if i said something good it's from Allah.
Anonymous
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« Reply #59 on: Oct 15, 2008 08:55 AM »

Women aren’t allowed to have multiple proposals. They can’t look at the next one until they have rejected the one before it.

Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #60 on: Oct 15, 2008 09:21 AM »

salam


Oh get over yourself.

Men should not send proposals to women who they (the man) know are considering a proposal from another man.

Women, have status in Islam, women have a voice in Islam, women are meant to be treated with kindness and respect in Islam, women are allowed to divorce as are men, if they are unhappy in their marriage, and the unhappiness does not have to be the brink of death before they seek divorce. And in Islam divorced, widowed or older women are not considered any less than men in these same circumstances.

Regarding the other post, sometimes marrying outside your comfort zone works, sometimes it comes back to bite you on your behind big time, like one of the posters said, marriage is a gamble.

Besides which with male attitudes as the above one, can anyone blame a woman for being terrified of accepting a proposal? I really hope your a missionary or something, and are not like this in reality, otherwise my duas are with your wife.



My criteria is even more firmly set now. No halo, I dont wanna know.



Wassalaam
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #61 on: Oct 15, 2008 12:00 PM »

As salaamu alaikum 

Okay I'm on a quest for the actual prohibiition on women looking at multiple options at the same time and not some opinion based patriarchial ideal that says that it is wrong.  Since there is no tie nor bond between those "looking" a woman has no obligation to be "faithful" to one at a time.  Just as men can "comparision" shop then so too should women be able to; afterall in the grand scheme of things it is a woman who is giving up the most - she's giving up that degree of authority to a man and in some cases a part of her persona then she has a greater need to make the wisest choice from among the available options.  No one buys shoes without trying on several pairs first to make sure they are comfortable or suitable for the intended purpose.

Aside from the very real fact that I'm tired of the arrogance and/or cowardice of my brothers - it's enough to make me scream at the top of my lungs from the top of the highest building or in the midst of the downtown lunch crowd; or make me go have a drink of  bebzi    but I really want to know.
Anonymous
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« Reply #62 on: Oct 15, 2008 02:29 PM »

salam

It's not a prohibition, its more manners I suppose, men are supposed to wait whilst the proposal before them is considered.


Wassalaam
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #63 on: Oct 15, 2008 03:02 PM »

Salam
Marriage is not fardh - so if most of the brothers think like our brother in previous posts then I would prefer to be unmarried and hope and pray that I have some one who thinks of women as "human beings" in Jannah.


There are many problems/ trails in the world, your own home should nt be one of them. I say if you have an option of either marrying someone who thinks like above posts and stay unmarried, go for being umarried, adopt a baby and raise that baby to be a better Muslim or Muslimah! Before anyone jumps on me with fatwas, by adoption I didnt mean changing last names etc. Raising children is very fulfilling and rewarding expereince, which is highly recommended by Rasul Allah.
Anonymous
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« Reply #64 on: Oct 15, 2008 03:31 PM »


Is it really me you hate or is it our Prophet saw?

"A believer is a brother of a believer. Hence it is not lawful for him to bargain upon the bargain of a brother, nor propose for (the hand of a girl) after the marriage proposal of his brother, until the latter (voluntarily) withdraws the proposal."

According to Imam Abu Hanifa, Imam Shafi'i, and Imam Malik it is a sin to do this.
Imam Dhahrir considers such a marriage as void.
It is a serious issue. Are you willing to meet second suitor know that he would be committing a sin due to that meeting? Would you warn him of the sin?
Would you inform him that you are seeing others and haven’t withdrawn from their proposal? If he still wants to go through with the meeting, would you really want such a sinful man as a husband?

Does this feminist slogan of Equality really mean that much to you that you with ignore a Hadith, or at best twist its meaning to such a extent that it disagrees with three of the four largest Sunni Schools of thought? Would you really be willing to risk living in Zina if Imam Dhahrir was right?

What you seem to think is I’m making up what I say and ignoring the consensus. This is not true. I am following what the real Scholars of Ahlal Sunna wal Jama say. And I ignore feminists’ slogans and the pronouncements of these new “scholars”, who just rabbit slogans from feminists while decorating them with misquoted verses.

Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #65 on: Oct 15, 2008 04:47 PM »

salam


If one proposal is unaware of another how would it then work?

From that hadith tho, the onus is on the man making the proposal, nothing in that hadith saying a woman should not consider other proposals presented to her, and everything about one man not going after another mans interest.

I've read a hadith whereby, a man asked about a woman he was considering marriage to, the first man replied he had once seen her kissing a man, the second man withdrew his proposal immediately, however when they next met the first man was married to the lady, upon enquiry it turned out that the lady was indeed of excellent character and the first man referred to the lady kissing her father, nothing lewd, but because he wished to wed her he had been amobigous in his reply. Nobody was blamed for anything in that haidth.
Must find the hadith.


Wassalaam
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #66 on: Oct 15, 2008 10:53 PM »

As salaamu alaikum

There is a difference between a woman still meeting potential husbands after she has accepted the proposal of someone and her meeting potential husbands when none has made a proposal of marriage.  I'm referring to the latter situation in my query and not the former.  Why on earth would I suggest that a woman who has found a suitable person continue to inteview prospects just as why would a brother who has made a proposal continue to interview prospects?  Now that would be just rude on the part of both parties.

And who said I was a feminist?  What I am is a realist and someone who has a gentle heart but will also not sit around and let anyone trample on it nor me and expect that I'm going to sit there and quiver and cry like a punk.  Quite frankly many of the brothers need to "man up" and stop acting like spoiled children that want to stamp their feet until they get exactly what they want even if that "want" is driven by the ideals of others and really isn't what they want.  One would think that a brother would want a strong woman that would "have their back" if times were tough; who could offer sound advice when needed; will correct them when they are wrong knowing that it is done with love and not out of a sense of misplaced self-righteousness; a woman who will guard herself and his secrets in his absence; someone who can roll up her sleeves and help if it will benefit the family and enable them to accomplish  task sooner; a woman who can hold a family together if he is temporarily unable to do so; someone who would lay down her very life for her family if it would keep them safe (meaning cares more about others than she does herself); someone who has already come into her own and so her loyalties are already known - etc. - as opposed to someone who crashes under pressure; is too scared to think or do; willing to blindly follow her husband down a wrong path (or off a cliff); who sits around and waits for him to do something all the while pestering him about it; who makes unrealistic demands with unresonable timeframes because "her daddy always did it" ; someone who doesn't yet know herself and once she "grows" may find that he's not worthy of her (so much for loyality) - etc.    Guess I was wrong; and guess what - I'm not afraid to admit when I'm wrong and learn from it (not that I'm wrong all that often).
Anonymous
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« Reply #67 on: Oct 15, 2008 11:38 PM »

There are men who want what you listed, but the question is do you want them?
Or would you prefer the unquestionable boss type who takes change of everything?
But that type prefer meek women to strong women?

The way I see things is there are a lot of weak women who like strong men to dominate them. They can easily find a partner.
Strong women who like weak men that they want to dominate, they can not so easily find a partner.
Strong women who like strong men, that’s the difficult bit. I feel these women are often confused about whether they want to be dominated or they want to dominate.

You can probably guess that I’m a strong character.
What you probably cant guess is so is my wife.
So you can guess that we argue a lot.
And we disagree on most things.
But the issue was we both knew what we were getting in to, I wanted someone who covered and she wanted someone who wouldn’t stop her covering.

I think this is very rare reason to choose a spouse.
And know you all will disagree with me but the way I see things: most men don’t see past their underpants and most women don’t see past his wallet when choosing a spouse.
And this doesn’t just apply to Muslims, it applies to nations, religions and cultures.
Anonymous
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« Reply #68 on: Oct 15, 2008 11:41 PM »

There should be a "all" before nations on the last sentence.
Anonymous
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« Reply #69 on: Oct 16, 2008 02:49 AM »

There seems to be the misconception that "strong" women are domineering; sorry to disappoint you but there is a difference between "strong" and "domineering".  I may be a "strong" sister but I certainly don't want a weak man - because if he's weak in character then there's a strong possibility that he's weak in bed too (yeah I'm going to be blunt   Shocked ) and with that said I'll take a pass on a "Mr. Wimpy" nor do I want some domineering idiot either who will make me afraid to move more than an inch nor breathe too hard and leave me crying more than smiling.  There is a middle ground and it exists in reality and not just in my dreams.

By strong I meant just what I wrote - someone who isn't going to cave at the first sign of difficulty; etc .........  It is this type than can encourage a man to be the best he can be (and not just medicore) because he will be "challenged" in positive ways and not just challenged or even ego-challenged.

There is also a misconception that docile or "weak" women aren't domineering and demanding; sometimes their methods are subtle and passive-aggressive and can be far worse than the outcome with a "strong" woman.

And hey; I'm glad I got an admission that men usually only think with their pants - that answers a lot; but is that also why they go for "weak" women; so they don't have to do an "effective" job? And deny her that portion of her rights  Shocked      (okay I really need to go pray for that outburst - **now hanging head in shame*** (will it happen again ?.........  I just don't know)  But women don't always think about the size of a man's wallet.......  but they think about the size of his intellect.   (I know you thought I was going somewhere else - shame shame)



Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #70 on: Oct 16, 2008 08:42 AM »

I’m going to be blunt now. By strength I meant leadership. Have you heard of the saying: too many cooks spoil the broth? Or: too many chiefs not enough Indians. You can replace the too with a two.
Both husband and wife can’t be in charge. It just isn’t possible. There are times when you will have differences that can’t be negotiated, at these times who plays submissive and who will be allowed to dominate?
Don’t say we’ll take turns, because that is just as impossible. Because who will decide whose turn it is to play the submissive?
I know feminists paint their ideal heterosexual relationship as some kind of egalitarian communism where all are leaders and everything is a consensus, but even in the lesbian relationships that feminists engage in one partner is always the Butch(man) while the other is the fem(woman), they have even made their own words for it!
I didn’t mean domineering in any negative sense; I meant it in a factual sense.
The physical side of the relationship is irrelevant to the above, because that depends on physical strength while the strength I mentioned is purely mental. There is no connection between mental strength and the physical side of things, whatever the talk shows say in the contrary.

When we are talking about the bottom of your post that I’m not going to repeat it isn’t the case with Muslims because: Most Muslim men as with most women are virgins at the time of marriage. The thing about male culture is during adolescence we all assume we are the best there is, and this continues in to marriage. Men don’t know about their own limitations. So they assume no such limitations exist.

So why do they find weak women attractive?
They want to be the white knight who rescues the damsel in distress.
So men brag about themselves to show they are the wide shouldered, hairy chested brash imagined individual that childhood fairy tails as well as the latest movies and computer games tell them that they must be.
And women want this whether they admit it or not.
This is what we all find attractive. So women often play the damsel in distress even if no real distress exists so men can play the street wise Hercules as part of our courtship ritual.

I developed physically long before I developed mentally. At about fourteen I was covered in muscles like an athlete and that’s about the age Girls and even women started making passes at me, but at that time I didn’t know what it was all about because I went to a all boys school and didn’t have sisters I didn’t know much about how the female mind works. A common role that they would play is the damsel in distress. They would ask for help when it is obvious none was needed. At the time I just thought that they were thick, as I developed and it happened more often I just thought the world was full of really thick people.
In college I wasn’t really good academically so didn’t know why female students and sometimes even teachers would come to me and ask me things knowing I never attend class and when I did I’d probably miss most of it due to the fact that I just didn’t care. I really couldn’t understand why they were taking my obviously wrong answers as fact. I thought that they all wanted to sit next to me because they assumed I was a genius and they wanted to copy off of me.
I realise now that it was just the game play. Women like the Hero and men like the damsel in distress. So men attempt the rescue even if they aren’t able and women have to fain distress even if no distress exists.
This happened in work where ladies in charge would act as if they were my subordinates even though I obviously didn’t have a clue about what was going on. So when they asked a question pretending to be in distress and I told them I didn’t have a clue, they would hint the answer to me, ask again, and when given the correct one would fain that they had been rescued.
Again at that time I thought that they thought I was a genius, I didn’t realise it was only single females who acting like this while with male colleges I was always the baby brother who needed to be taken under the wing.

What I mean is the world is all game play. None of it is real. You have to play the rules or you get left behind. You can’t hope that all of a sudden each and every individual will rewrite the rule books for you. So unless you want to remain lonely you have to choose from people willing to choose you instead of those you prefer but don’t prefer you. That is unless you can find a way to convince them that they should be choosing you instead of the damsel in distress.

You mentioned how you will make a great wife, better than the damsels in distress. Unless you want to play the game you have to try and find away of convincing suitors of this, that you are better than the damsel. Because the world and everyone in it have always told them that damsels in distress are best.

Unless you want to stop aiming for the preferred white knight and be satisfied with being the nurse to the wounded soldier. This is the rule reversed of what I mentioned above. And this is probably a more likely play if all that is on offer are younger, poorer and/or less dominant men. In this role you are dominant (in a extremely famine way) but gentle, you try and fix what is broken and turn what you have in to what you want.
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #71 on: Oct 16, 2008 09:45 AM »

salam

Wealth can change, my criteria (when I was younger and dreaming of marriage), was that he'd be really sweet and we'd grow together as two people. It didnt happen (never mind), but its unfair and actually wrong to say that women only look at money.

Wasn't it you who said your friend wanted to get married but culturally her mahr would be set too high for her fiance to pay, so she gave him the money to gift her?

Yes sure there must be women in the world who's sole criteria is money, they make up the bulk of the articles in celeb trash magazines, but most self respecting women just want a husband who will be kind, and loving and help and support them in their pursuit of knowledge. Someone to share your hopes and dreams without being ridiculed, someone you can be closer to than your closest friend.

Based on my own knowledge and experience, and being utterly cocksure to the point of arrogance I know I can pull in a big salary if I wanted (inshallah), I would never ever marry a man based solely on his income, he would have to be working but past that money is not the issue.

Based on my own experience, I would say that in marriage one spouse is not going to be great at everything, we both had our strong points, and based on these we split things accordingly. I suppose there must be marriages where the husband is in charge of absolutely everything, but that must make him very tired and irritable especially if the husband then also works outside of the home.





Wassalaam
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #72 on: Oct 16, 2008 12:31 PM »

I'm finding some of this quite humorous despite everything else.  You are right there cannot be two leaders and so in a marriage leadership is often deferred to the husband; however if he is truly a sound leader he won't dismiss the opinions or views of his wife as being "silly woman thoughts" but instead would value her counsel.  Women don't want to be in charge but they do think in terms beyond just themselves; women think about the family's benefit and as such don't chase rainbows or schemes because someone said it was a good idea.

Knight in shining armour eh?  And just who is going to polish that armour when he gets it tarnished with a cluess plan?

Damsel in distress; sure ask me to build something or repair something (other than sewing related) and I'm totally clueless and not afraid to admit it nor am I willing to try - did that a few times and only created more work for someone else not to mention a few smashed fingers and gasp! a broken finger nail.    My independence came out of necessity and not desire.  Those women who can't write out a check to pay a bill; pump gas into a car; pick up the phone and call a repair man (uh repair person); or adequately hold a conversation with a teacher or doctor  etc. are the ones who are truly lost if there's no man around.  Their world crumbles and they crumble with it. 

And goodness knows it's not just unmarried virgin men that "talk a good game"; divorced non-virgin men think they are the "greatest thing walking" but can they match their talk?  Doubt it so they need to just keep walking lest someone get bored and insult them (or laugh themselves silly).

A "pretty pretty princess" will exhaust a man mentally and physcially when he has to work outside the home and take care of things inside the home because she's "just too pretty to do anything".  And I would think he'd go crazy if he couldn't engage in a mature conversation.

Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #73 on: Oct 16, 2008 12:49 PM »

salam


Goodness! Teachers and students. I think I can honestly say, no person as good looking as you profess to be has ever crossed my path ever, male or female

female students and sometimes even teachers would come to me and ask me things knowing I never attend class and when I did I’d probably miss most of it due to the fact that I just didn’t care. I really couldn’t understand why they were taking my obviously wrong answers as fact. I thought that they all wanted to sit next to me because they assumed I was a genius and they wanted to copy off of me.
I realise now that it was just the game play.

What kind of questions did teachers ask you, did they then take your completely wrong answer and present it as fact in class? How funny, lucky you werent in a class with me, I'd have corrected the teachers...


Wassalaam
Anonymous
Guest
« Reply #74 on: Oct 16, 2008 01:02 PM »

Flirting is just the game play, it happens all the time. Between students and between students and teachers in both directions. As long as the line isn’t crossed no one has a problem with it. I’m surprised you didn’t notice it going around you when you were in college?

The frill of the chase is just as fun if you have no intention of capturing your prey.
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