Asalaamu Alaikum... I need help to stop the major sins i commit every now and then...I am only 16 and I am proud of myself that I have changed from not praying at all to pray ing everyday' saying allah's name alot but there is this one sin that if i could just stop would make me feel SO better...can someone give me advice on how to stop sinning and just be a MUSLIM.
I haven't been on the Madinat for a long time, but for some reason I decided to check today...
First of all - WE LOVE YOU! All of us, each and everyone of us are your family. Jzk for entrusting us with your problem and allowing us the amana to help you. You have already taken the first step: understanding that there is a problem. Allahadulilah. You have the understanding and wisdom that something has to change.
Allah has planned something better for you - and its best that we turn to Him to guidance. How else did you end up here where amazing people such as Sis Jannah and others are here to listen to you. He will answer your prayers if you ask him for sincere repentance.
Here are some things to help you right away
1.) Stay away from immediate Haram, especially anything that leads to shirk (association of anything with Allah)
2.) Dump Friends who lead you to Haram
3.) Remove any Haram materials from your environment
1.) Make dua to Allah to give you strength and ask for sincere repentance that he forgives your for your sins. Do this in private.
2.) Make an intension to stay in constant wudu - it will keep you from doing activities can can break your wudu
3.) Pray all prayers on time, especially fajr - Praying on time interupts activities or travel to haram places or activities that can break wudu. There is no such thing as Qadaa/Qazaa prayers - you are obligated to pray on time.
4.) Eat Halal food if you are not doing so already.
5.) Find better friends - build relationships with them
6.) Hide your secrets - do not disclose them to others - saying them out loud leads us to believe it is okay
7.) Find and join a halaqa or study circle - increase your knowledge, as a minimum trying to keep up with a halaqa will reduce your free time.
8.) Find a Shaiyh or Scholar or Imam to get advise
9.) Make a list / a goal of what you want to accomplish by the time you are 20, 25, 30, 35 and 40
Measure yourself against those goals to see how close you are.
There was a study where they found 3% of high school students had clear goals when they graduated. The study contacted them 20 years later and found out that these 3% controlled 80% of the weath of their graduating class.
10.) Spend time with your family. Spend time with your mom and tell her you love her. Help her complete the household chores, especially the very hard ones such as garbage and washrooms clean up... be a model son to your mom. As a minimum, fix your room to be the most organized clean room so that it becomes like a masjid. Remove the word "ooff" from your vocabularly when she tells you something - it is the most painful word a mother (and later your wife) can hear. Listen to her stories when she was growing up, find out what is troubling her the most, and see if you are the source of any of them. Laugh with her and Lead her in salaah.
If you have not hugged your mother today, do it today. Tell her that you want to be a better Muslim starting today and that you want her help you by making dua for you.
**The dua of your mother and your grandmother(s) are the dua that protects you the most, because they are the ones who love you the most, even if you don't love yourself**
It doesn't matter what you have done or your circumstances up to this point, its never too late to fix yourself until your 6 feet under... but you have to start now.
Jzk for Reading