// Is it ok to have a diary?
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Anonymous
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« on: Mar 07, 2012 06:39 AM »


Assalamu alakium,

I have been trying really, really hard not to talk about people who make me angry or annoyed.  So I was wondering is it ok to put my thoughts in a diary-no matter how bad the thoughts are?

For example, I have in-laws who are super competitive about everything, who brag and show off.  I do feel bad for them, because haram this is how they feel they have to prove they are "worth something" by acting like this.  It is much deeper than this though.

I use to talk about them all the time, which I stopped because it is haram.  But since I keep all of this annoyance in me I feel like I'm going to explode.  I feel if I write my feelings down, it will help me.  But is this still haram?

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Hard2Hit
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« Reply #1 on: Mar 07, 2012 06:48 PM »

Wa Alaikum Assalam,

What if your in-laws see your diary ?!

How about you make an imaginary virtual friend and tell everything to him ? Or may be tell everything to us e-buddies...

Hmm... even better would be that you keep telling it to Allah [s.w.t] after your daily salah... that would be kewl, no?

The knight doesn't wait when he's ill or has cancer brother, the knight fights on... He finds a strategy, changes tactics, and hits hard.
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« Reply #2 on: Mar 07, 2012 11:58 PM »

Walaikum Asalaam,

I agree with Br. Hard2Hit, it wouldnt be nice to write everything down and then have it found, especially because sometimes we react differently when angry and later on after the matter, we realize it wasn't so bad as our reaction.

I've been having issues lately too with "venting" and dealing with people who make me angry. In laws is a bit touchy since you don't want to cross boundaries/ respect with them....I guess. Maybe like Br. Hard2Hit, you can just talk to Allah tala, and not only that maybe even make dua for them that they drop their bad habits and also that blindly you don't pick them up ...and just accept that we all have different pros and cons / goods and bads ...etc

I am not saying that you don't ..just some ideas to ponder about.
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« Reply #3 on: Mar 09, 2012 06:34 PM »

Talking to Allah tala after salah is the best. But if u want to write it down perhaps do that and tear it soon afterwards. Don't keep it. Its way too dangerous.
Blessedgrandma
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« Reply #4 on: Mar 20, 2012 02:02 AM »

Please don't put anything in writing that you wouldn't want your spouse, in-laws, children, parents to find out and read should you be away, in the hospital or if you died. I really respect the above answers.
This may sound silly but I find sitting by a river or stream with pebbles in my hand and thinking of my annoyance and dropping a pebble in for each one as I think it, forgive it and forget it.
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« Reply #5 on: Mar 20, 2012 09:53 PM »

I agree, dont ever write anything that you wouldnt want ending up in the wrong hands. Your thoughts are for yourself, if you really need to get them off your chest, burn/shred the paper afterwards (I am assuming that the act of writing gets the burden off your chest, and you dont go back and re-read them again and again haha).

I love blessedgrandmas idea of putting pebbles in a stream... so peaceful and meditative!!
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