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The dhulan doth protest too much.


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Author Topic: How do you give advice?  (Read 311 times)
Nature
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« on: Oct 28, 2012 04:27 PM »


Assalamualaikum,

One thing which I'm sure we all deal with is how to give advice without seeming like some kind of righteous jerk. Islam asks us to all stick together and give each other advice when we see wrong happening-but how do we do it?

For me this came up because here at my school I basically see a huge spectrum of people and views and ideas. I have a Muslim girl in my hall who wears hijab-but since we came her clothe have been getting tighter and shoter and very much less Islamic- and basically I fear that she will end up not wearing hijab very quickly. I want to speak to her-but I don't want to seem preachy, as I'm perceived as very religious/conservative already.
Fozia
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« Reply #1 on: Oct 28, 2012 05:45 PM »

Are you close?


If she's a friend then you can just talk about how you're both coping with life at the university, how difficult it is to acheive the right blaance especially as your so far from home and the anchoring influence of your family. Then agree to get together to pray regularly or something.

Tell her you are glad you've got a muslim friend as it is so easy to go with what everybody else is doing and you're glad of a reminder.

Thats if you are friends, if not, there's not much you can do. Except maybe start by becoming friends with her and being a reminder to her.

And when My servants question thee concerning Me, then surely I am nigh. I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me. So let them hear My call and let them trust in Me, in order that they may be led aright. Surah 2  Verse 186
Nature
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Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)Nature is a force to reckon with mA! :)
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« Reply #2 on: Oct 28, 2012 09:06 PM »

Thank you Fozia! Your words are true, of course, and they really struck a chord with me, that of how the best way to show people something is often simply by setting an example. I re-read that article on Suhaibwebb today, "How to be Religious without being a Jerk", and it just totally clicked.
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