// Mother's Day: An Islamic Perspective
    Peace be upon you,
    Welcome to Madinat Al-Muslimeen, the City of the Muslims. Please feel free to visit the different hot spots around the Madina and post any discussion, articles, suggestions, comments, art, poetry, events, recipes, etc etc. Basically anything you would like to share with your sisters and brothers!! Non-muslims are also of course quite welcome to share their comments. If this is your first time here, you need to register with the city council. Once you register you have 15 days to post your mandatory introduction and then you will be upgraded to a Madina Citizen, God Willing. Please note that our city does have regulations which are listed in the city constitution. Read them carefully before moving in. P.S. - You can also post anonymously if you wish. P.S.S. - Also be sure to check out our ARCHIVES from 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006 & 2007. :)

Random Quote: Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil. - Jerry Garcia
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Mother's Day: An Islamic Perspective  (Read 4630 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
Faizah
Sis
Sr. Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
Faizah has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 365



« on: Apr 24, 2008 12:40 PM »


As salaamu alaikum

No doubt we are hiting sensory overload as we see sales flyers and greeting cards being promoted for Mother's Day, the day set aside to honor one's Mother.  For those of us who are still blessed to have their moms with them, they want to show that extra bit of love and appreciation and for those of us whose moms have passed away, the day is sometimes used to reflect upon the mutal love and respect we have (I fall into the latter category of one whose mom passed away and so she is missed daily).

Anyway, I came across the following piece and wanted to share.  I've seen a few writings and articles on the topic, as I'm sure we all have, but wanted to share this one nonetheless.

As salaamu alaikum

Fa'izah

~~~~~~

An Islamic Look At Mother's Day
written by Fiazuddin Shu'ayb
 

What does Islam say about Mother's Day? Can Muslims join with non-Muslims in observing a special day for mothers? These are some of the questions students posed to me recently.

A Muslim believes in the right of his parents upon him and his rights towards them (birr) as well as obedience and kindness (ihsaan). That is so, according to Shaykh Abu Bakr AlJazaa'ir, not because they are a cause for his existence, or that they did good to him that compels him to do the same to them, but because Allah made compulsory upon him such social behavior toward his parents.

Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life say not to them a word of contempt nor repel them but address them in terms of honor.
 
And out of kindness lower to them the wing of humility and say: "My Lord! bestow on them Thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood" (QI7:23-24)
     
Notice in the aayah how Allah mentioned first His right to be worshipped alone, next He mentioned righteousness to parents. In this divine arrangement of great honor and rank has been given to kind treatment of parents. In other aayaat the Qur'an singles out mothers for special citation.
   
And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him and in years twain was his weaning. (hear the command) "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal. (Q31:14).
   
The Messenger of Allah (S) said to a man who asked him "Who has the greater right to my good relationship?" He (S) said: "your mother," He asked: "Who is next?" He (S) replied: "your mother." He asked: "Who is next?" He (S) said: " your mother." He asked again: "And who is next?" He (S) said: "your father". (Agreed Upon)
 
Islamic Law does not only make reverence to the wombs that bore us a legal obligation on children but also condemns the severing of maternal affection as a sinful, unlawful (haraam) act. The Prophet (S) said "Verily, Allah has made haraam the severing of (social ties) with mothers" (Agreed Upon) "Shall I not inform you of the greatest of the major sins?" The companion said "Yes, 0 messenger of Allah!" Then He (S) said: "Associating partners with Allah (Ash-Shirk) and severing of family relationship ..." (Agreed Upon).
   
Abdullah bn Mas'ud (May Allah be pleased with him) said. "I asked the Messenger (S) of Allah "Which action is more beloved to Allah?" He (S) said: "Righteousness to parents." I then asked him "what comes next?" He(S) said. "Jihaad ('holy war) against infidels." It is well known that the jihaad is of a fard al-Khifayah type(that is, compulsory upon the community but not upon every individual member)> For example, a youth desirous of fighting for the cause of Islam must seek his parents permission before he can participate in the 'holy war'.
   
Once a man came to the Prophet (S) and said to him:" O Messenger Of Allah! Does anything remain of righteousness toward my parents after they die?" He (s) said. "Yes, (these are) Salaah (funeral prayer) over them, seeking Allah's forgiveness for them, fulfilling their contractual obligations, honoring their friends, and maintaining the ties of the womb before which there was for you no other womb--that is what remains upon you in respect of your righteousness toward them after their death." (Reported By Abu Dawood).
     
Clearly, Islam says a lot about Mother's Day! In fact, every day in the life of a Muslim is mother's day, which involves showing kindness, respect, love, and consideration for mothers. That is because Islam, unlike other religions and lifestyles, makes reverence of the wombs a religious obligation and a moral duty observed even in respect of a Muslim who may have non-Muslim parents, as the following hadith indicates. Asmaa, the daughter of Abu Bakr (May Allaah be pleased with them both!) said. "My mother, who was a pagan (mushrik), visited me during the time of the Messenger Of Allah (s), so I sought from him a legal opinion (fatwaa). I said :" My mother came to me and she is in need of help: Do I maintain ties of kinship with her?" He (S) said. Yes! Maintain the ties of kinship with your mother." (Reported by Al-Bukhari). Islam also goes further and stipulates that such social relationship, albeit in different forms, continue after the demise of the parents, as suggested by the above hadeeths.
     
What about the question of Muslims following the non-Muslims and observing Mother's Day by giving of gifts, flowers, taking them out to restaurants, and so forth? Our answer is that we should avoid doing so since this would involve imitation of the disbelievers (Kuffaar), which Islam prohibits. The Prophet (s) said: "Whoever imitates a people is of them." {Reported by Abu Dawood). Mind you, Islam is not against the giving of gifts to parents. On the contrary, give them lots of gifts but do not make so-called Mother's day an eid (festival) for doing so. We need only to give ourselves an inch in following the Kuffaar and soon we shall take the whole mile in imitating them in other matters. This is what is known in Islam as the Lizard's Syndrome. (The Prophet (S) said: "You will certainly follow the ways of those before you inch by inch, cubit by cubit until if they entered a lizard's hole, you will follow them." When asked: "O messenger of Allah! Are they the Jews and the Christians?" He (S) replied: "Who else?" (Reported by Al-Bukbari)
     
The observance of Mother's Day has no scriptural basis. It was introduced here in Trinidad & Tobago by the late non-Muslim woman, Audrey Jeffers, in 1927. She felt at that time the need to draw public attention to mothers who were contributing to nation building in a variety of ways but whose efforts largely went unnoticed and unrecognized. A special day of the year she felt should be set aside to salute mothers, as had been done by other countries. Mother's day therefore is a non-Islamic observance introduced by disbelievers. It was a result of the women's liberation movement of the West. We have shown in elsewhere that women's liberation actually began with Islam some 1400 years ago. So the question of women's liberation for us is a moot one.
 
One of the social abnormalities of Western society is the institution of old folks' homes where senile parents, like endangered species, are put to reside by their offspring caught up in the insane rat race. Whereas in the Islamic Society (still a utopic entity), the extended family would cushion the trauma and alienation suffered by the elderly through preservation of the ties of kinship.
     
We must resist the charms of the Kuffaar in setting an agenda for us in the political, social, economic, and cultural spheres of life. The Qur'an says:
   
O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors: they are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is of them. Verily Allah guideth not a people unjust. (Q5:51)
   
Never will the Jews or the Christians be satisfied with thee unless thou follow their form of religion. Say: "The guidance of Allah that is the (only) guidance." .. Wert thou to follow their desires after the knowledge which hath reached thee then wouldst thou find neither protector nor helper against Allah. (Q2:120)
     
We cannot evolve an indigenous Islamic cultural identity until we purge all negative non-Islamic influences from our lifestyles, conduct, and behavior.
     
Then We put thee an the (right) Way of Religion: so follow thou that (Way) and follow not the desires of those who know not.
     
They will be of no use to thee in the sight of Allah: it is only Wrongdoers (that stand as) protectors one to another: but Allah is the Protector of the Righteous. (Q. 45:18-19.)
Some Proprieties Aadaab In Relation To Mothers (And Fathers Too):

Let us not set aside a day specially to observe kindness toward mothers, or parents, or children, nor Islamize such a day. Instead, let us observe the following ethical principles every day of our lives in relation to our parents.

Obedience to them is compulsory in all that they command or prohibit so long as such obedience does not involve sin against Allah. There is no obedience to creation in disobedience to the Creator. "But if they strive to make thee join in worship with Me things of which thou hast no knowledge obey them not; Yet bear them company in this life with justice (and consideration) and follow the way of those who turn to Me (in love): in the End the return of you all is to Me and I will tell you the truth (and meaning) of all that ye did." (Q.31:15)
Be humble to them, honor show them kindness and mercy in both speech and deed.. Don't raise your voice above their voices. Don't burden them with your responsibilities nor call them by their names; but say "0 Ma" or "0 Pa" or "Abu" or "Ummi".

Clothe them. feed them, and shelter them. When they fall sick look after their medical needs, defend them from harm and make sacrifice for them, and add to this what has been mentioned in the above hadeeths and aayaat of the Qu'ran.

Let us at the same time avoid saying "Happy Mother's Day". Let us instead supplicate for our mothers--and fathers--everyday by saying: "Rabb-ir ham Humaa Kamm Rabayaanee Sagheerah "O My Lord! Have mercy on both of them as they did care for me when I was little." (Q. 17- 24).

site reference:    http://ifrad.multiply.com/journal/item/3/An_Islamic_Look_At_Mothers_Day
lucid
Bro
Sr. Member
*

Reputation Power: 15
lucid has no influence :(
Gender: Male
Posts: 387



« Reply #1 on: May 15, 2008 07:41 PM »

that was a pretty shallow article.

people always bang on about not imitating the kuffar...that you become like those you imitate...etc...etc....

the last i noticed, the kuffar drive cars, use the internet, eat food, believe in human rights, love their mothers,.....,and so do many muslims.  gee these dodgy muslims are imitating the kuffar!!! astagfirullah!!!!

seriously, people should be very wary of those who use arguments like these -- such people have an agenda, and it is drive nonmuslims and in the process -- muslims -- away from islam.  they want to drive a wedge between between muslims and the rest of the world because of a pathetic inferiority complex masquerading as a superiority complex.

islam is an inclusive religion, a mercy for mankind, and muslims are as the quran says, the best of of peoples. we are not the communalists  a bunch of extremist salafis would want us to be...

btw: i think mother's day is perfectly fine; if muslims can celebrate the birth of the prophet (something not celebrated during the prophet's time), then they can surely celebrate the kindness of their mother's at least once a year...

my sister and i gave my mom a cool gift on mother's day...and she loved it!

assalamu alaikum
blackrose
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
blackrose has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 1649



« Reply #2 on: May 15, 2008 08:01 PM »

walaikumsalaam

I totally agree with Lucid.
I think people should be really careful when they call this 'haram'

I think it brings nothing but good.
blackrose
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
blackrose has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 1649



« Reply #3 on: May 15, 2008 08:02 PM »

ok so the hypocrisy,
my sons islamic school did nothing for mothers day, but then they send a letter for 'teacher appreciation wk' telling us to bring flowers/chocolates/supplies, ect.
jamilahz
Sis
Newbie
*

Reputation Power: 0
jamilahz has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 12



WWW
« Reply #4 on: May 16, 2008 10:21 PM »

Not to be a crud, but Mothers day is traced back to ancient Greece to honor Rhea, the mother of the gods.  In the 1600's it was adopted by the Christian Church to honor Mary, the mother of Christ.  Later by Christian religious decree it was expanded to include honoring all mothers.  Then as Christianity spread through Europe the celebration changed to honor 'Mother Church', the spiritual power that gave them life and protected them from harm.  Over time people started honoring their mothers as well as the church. 

While I respect everyones right to have an opinion, driving a car, using the internet is not the kinds of things that the Prophet (saws) was talking about when he said 'he who imitates him is one of him'.  Also, we celebrate two days, Eid ul Fitr and Eid Al Adha.  Any other celebration (especially those with pagan or religious origin) should be avoided. 

We should be honoring our mothers everyday.


The Prophet said, "The people of my generation are the best, then those who follow them"
se7en
Sis
Sr. Member
*

Reputation Power: 11
se7en has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 358



« Reply #5 on: May 28, 2008 05:24 AM »


as salaamu alaykum,

I know there is a difference of opinion among the ulema regarding these kinds of holidays (holdays that are not religiously based) and what 'imitation of the kuffar' really means (Imam Suhaib Webb had an interesting post about that hadeeth on his blog recently, you can check it out at suhaibwebb.com/blog) so I'm not talking about the issue from a haram/halal perspective, but, I have to agree with the author in that we shouldn't have a special day where we try to make amends for our behavior the rest of the year.  It's just like "Earth Day" which is kind of sad really, where everyone is supposed to think about taking care of the environment for one day, while the rest of the year we do nothing to curb our polluting and damaging of the environment or to make our lifestyles less detrimental to the earth.  Its the same sort of concept here.

I can also understand why some people in the Muslim world are particularly alarmed about these types of holidays -- they are relatively new in these societies and some people fear that with their adoption, the cultural attitudes they stems from will also be adopted.  For example, I remember in Syria Valentine's Day was something that was getting bigger and more popular each year.  In my opinion I think that this type of resistence from the Muslim world to what are basically Western/non-Muslim practices are actually healthy and a good thing...  'the weak seek to imitate the strong'.  Allahu 'alam.

7
Halima
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 39
Halima is working their way up :)Halima is working their way up :)Halima is working their way up :)
Gender: Female
Posts: 1714



« Reply #6 on: May 28, 2008 11:58 AM »

ok so the hypocrisy,
my sons islamic school did nothing for mothers day, but then they send a letter for 'teacher appreciation wk' telling us to bring flowers/chocolates/supplies, ect.

'Teacher appreciaton week?'  Oh my!  The things you get to read!  I swear, I have never heard that one before!  Sounds like something that was just concoted by the teachers to get attention and treats for nothing.  How sad. 

A parent or parents will appreciate a teacher or teachers once they have had support and understanding from a teacher(s).  That goes without saying.  But to make a week for it.  That is just too much.  What if they don't derserve it?

The Almighty Allah says,

"When a servant thinks of Me, I am near.
When he invokes Me, I am with him.
If he reflects on Me in secret, I reply in secret,
And if he acknowledges Me in an assembly,
I acknowledge him in a far superior assembly."

- Prophet Muhammad (SAW), as reptd by Abu Huraira
BrKhalid
Bro
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 27
BrKhalid barely matters :(BrKhalid barely matters :(
Gender: Male
Posts: 1352



« Reply #7 on: May 28, 2008 12:15 PM »

Asalaamu Alaikum   bro


Does this mean guys that our plans for Admin appreciation day have to be shelved? Wink


Ahhh well, I’m quite content with End of Ramadhan and End of Arafat appreciation days  bro

Say: "O ye my servants who believe! Fear your Lord, good is (the reward) for those who do good in this world. Spacious is God's earth! those who patiently persevere will truly receive a reward without measure!" [39:10]
Halima
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 39
Halima is working their way up :)Halima is working their way up :)Halima is working their way up :)
Gender: Female
Posts: 1714



« Reply #8 on: May 28, 2008 02:38 PM »

Asalaamu Alaikum   bro


Does this mean guys that our plans for Admin appreciation day have to be shelved? Wink

Ah BrKhalid, we always appreciated our Admin without pinning it on a particular day or occassion.  If we liked anything they have done, we just came out and expressed our pleasure.

Quote
Ahhh well, I’m quite content with End of Ramadhan and End of Arafat appreciation days  bro


End of Ramadhan and Arafat are the most auspicous and beautiful days for appreciation!

The Almighty Allah says,

"When a servant thinks of Me, I am near.
When he invokes Me, I am with him.
If he reflects on Me in secret, I reply in secret,
And if he acknowledges Me in an assembly,
I acknowledge him in a far superior assembly."

- Prophet Muhammad (SAW), as reptd by Abu Huraira
blackrose
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
blackrose has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 1649



« Reply #9 on: May 28, 2008 11:29 PM »

actually sister Halima, teacher appreciation week is a national thing so is that not 'imitating'

Im sorry but the reason they use about how we should be honoring our mother and earth day every day dosnt make sense for not being able to have a special day' I think as muslims its already obligatory to have earth day and mothers day everyday, but I think those days are given so we can be specially educated and remind people and again I dont think it brings anything but good. I celebrate mothers day by atleast calling my mom and saying 'happy mothers day' and giving a gift but that never stopped me from respecting her on other days and giving gifts on other days.

salaam
blackrose
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
blackrose has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 1649



« Reply #10 on: May 28, 2008 11:31 PM »

an example would be kind of like how countries and leaders are allowed to make rules for the benefit of the citizens and society (as stated in the fatwa anon posted in the canada polygamous topic in the forum) then why wouldnt it be allowed for countries to make up some special holidays.
blackrose
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
blackrose has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 1649



« Reply #11 on: Jun 17, 2008 04:35 AM »

Mother’s Day and parents in Islam
By Khaled Hamid
http://www.stltoday.com/blogzone/civil-religion/islam/2008/05/mothers-day-and-parents-in-islam/
Faizah
Sis
Sr. Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
Faizah has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 365



« Reply #12 on: Jun 18, 2008 12:32 AM »

As salaamu alaikum

The point as mentioned is that we should honor our mothers everyday and therefore this "set aside" day is really nothing more than regular day of honoring and cherishing one's mother.  The problem is for those (sadly it would seem Muslims as well) who are rude to their mothers and treat them like dirt or like the family servant and then want to think some trinket on one "set aside" day is going to make up for the other 364 days of nastiness.  Mother's don't think about their children and treat them with kindness on their "special" day once a year; rather a mother starts to love and care for her child from the moment she becomes aware of it's existence wthin her body and that love and caring doesn't end.

For those of us without our mothers all the attention placed on this "set aside" day is heartbreaking.  I miss my mother every day not just on "Mother's Day"; my tears know no day nor time and therefore wait until it is permissible to appear.

We really have to stop thinking that there's no harm in something when we are supposed to be above going for the things that everyone else is doing.

Days such as Administrative Assistant Appreciation Week (formerly known as Secretaries' Day) or even Bosses' Day or any other "day" is nothing more than the design of big business to make more money by "guilting" us into spending money we could put to better use. 

We are taught to do many things -  give in charity for example - but for the most part people only remember that during Ramadan as if people aren't in need any other time of year.  (I say the same about non-Muslims who want to remember the needy only during Thanksgiving and Christmas - like people only need to eat once a year and only need a gift or company once a year?).  So these "set aside" days serve what purpose if they only prompt action once a year; it doesn't clear the conscience nor absolve one of the obligation to share the blessings they have received.

But all in all its a moot point; all people are going to do what they want when they want (or when others say they should).   

Fa'izah
blackrose
Sis
Hero Member
*

Reputation Power: 3
blackrose has no influence :(
Gender: Female
Posts: 1649



« Reply #13 on: Jun 18, 2008 04:48 AM »

Quote
We really have to stop thinking that there's no harm in something when we are supposed to be above going for the things that everyone else is doing

no I dont beleive there is any harm in it, unless the person makes harm, yes some people do extravagance in weddings, in dinner parties, in almost anything . this is a person to person issue. but does this mean we should not have weddings or dinner parties?  Prophet Muhammad pbuh said giving gifts to ea other bring love. You dont have to give it in mothers day only you can give it throught the yr. and /or you can give in mothers day also, whats the diff.

You are right about some people who only tend to give charity and be good during Ramadan, but then Allah swt did not take away ramadan for us bc of that now did he? This is again a person to person issue. Again as I said befoer I do call up my mom and tell her 'happy mothers day' and give her a gift' but that absolutely does not stop me from calling her every other day. infact i talk to her almost every day plus I give gifts throught the yr.  so I dont believe there is any harm to also call her on mothers day and say happy mothers day. the whole world is doing it I def would not want her to feel left out specially again since i dont c ne harm in  it. we should not make religion hard. It should be eazy and we should not make things that dont harm us or things that havent been said are unlawful, unlawful.
Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to: