// Despair - am i evil ?
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Anonymous
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« on: Aug 23, 2013 08:57 PM »


Assalamu alikom,

Recently, I've been surrounded by scandals everywhere and rumors.
and some accused me -indirectly- that i'm a an evil and monafiq.
May be because of some political situations i made, or because of media or my personal situations.

I'm not a famous character, I'm just jobless and doing post-graduate studies.
Yet someone is following my actions and speaking, criticizing it,
till i'm completely broken. plus i'm not raised to have self-confidence.

sometimes i got -indirect- praise, but i believe it's not sincere.

Now, I'm too lonely and desperate, good fellows have stopped talking to me.

I even see myself as a killer or at least converted out of Islam,
and that i deserve all such scandals.
Whatever I do to raise my faith, is converted to complete evil !!

I can't focus on my prayers or zikr or even study,
i feel i don't deserve to be happy anymore.
can't stop it.

maybe i really deserve it all, and i'm not close to Allah swt.
I dunno.

Is there a way out. plzz advise.

Thanks,

This post submitted using the ANONYMOUS button on the main Madina menu. Please reply here publicly so that the original poster can read any replies.
akhan
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« Reply #1 on: Aug 24, 2013 03:25 AM »

One thing that might help is to take everything people say with a pinch of salt. I don't know what you did but I'm assuming it's good inshallah and good always attracts criticism. Our most destructive fallacy is that we derive our sense of worth from other people's perception of us. "X said I'm good so I must be." "Y said I'm stupid so I must be."...isn't that how we think?
We have to stop thinking about what other people think of us. Just do good and forget about it, the reward lies with Allah not with what people say.
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« Reply #2 on: Aug 24, 2013 01:26 PM »

Salaam,

Don't know what kind of evil you did.But ppl who do evil things keep doing it with much pomp and without any bit of remorse.

That you are already guilty and conscious of whatever you have done,even if it was/was not evil,proves that you are God fearing.
Although it actually hurts when ppl are evil enough to pass judgements on others,I am sure you know Allah judges everyone based on their intentions.
So
Just do the right work and leave the rest to Allah.Allah is the Best Judge.Not people.
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« Reply #3 on: Aug 24, 2013 05:37 PM »

Do you have close family to surround yourself with?

I think you need to take care of yourself you sound overwhelmed, I'd go see a doctor if you're unable to function.

I rarely take on board other people's criticism of me as mostly people haven't got a clue about me so their opinions make up a small fraction of what they see and the rest are utterly incorrect assumptions. Takes time to develope that level of indifference tho.

You've got to learn to stop doing whatever bad and repent, then forgive yourself and start becoming the person you would like to be.

Spending a lot of time pondering on past negativity isn't going to erase that and you'll waste your present.

And when My servants question thee concerning Me, then surely I am nigh. I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me. So let them hear My call and let them trust in Me, in order that they may be led aright. Surah 2  Verse 186
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« Reply #4 on: Aug 24, 2013 06:31 PM »

hmmm..OP did something bad? I can only see people criticising him/her for what he/she did. If you did my response will be the same as the others.
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« Reply #5 on: Aug 24, 2013 07:07 PM »

 
The OP was of a clean heart and sensitive to get affected by others remarks.
If he/she was evil,he/she wouldn't have been in a state of despair.

The OP needs to calm down,contemplate on what the actual problem is and be hopeful of Allah's help in dealing with the situation.

  
Fozia
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« Reply #6 on: Aug 24, 2013 07:45 PM »



Sis I think Br Akhan was saying he'd read the OP differently, no criticism.

And when My servants question thee concerning Me, then surely I am nigh. I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me. So let them hear My call and let them trust in Me, in order that they may be led aright. Surah 2  Verse 186
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« Reply #7 on: Aug 25, 2013 02:18 AM »

Ah!ok!u r right sis!I must have read br akhan's post differently now!sorry!!

I shall thus,to avoid any confusion,omit the unnecessary form my previous post and stick to what is relevant.Thanks.

Hope all these posts help the OP some way.
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« Reply #8 on: Aug 25, 2013 06:25 AM »

It sounds all like the whispers of shaitan to me. Keep thinking and rethinking about what other people are saying and thinking about you to the point where you stop praying and dhikr!! This is what shaitan wants. I'll tell you a secret I learned after a lot of heartache, no matter what you do in life people will criticize it and talk about it. You will always have enemies and frenemies. And if you do anything in life and the more you do in life and the more political you are and the more you take a stance on something or actually even DO something with your life the more enemies you'll have.

So take a deep breath, say authubillah min ashshaytan ar Rajeem and continue on the right path.
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« Reply #9 on: Aug 25, 2013 05:20 PM »

Even reputation is from Allah. So chin up, back to the prayer mat you go. Let them say what they say.
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